Short Stories

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Valentine in the Desert
By Alisa Hill
November 20, 2006

Carving out the time and place to escape the rat race of city life can be difficult. There is always someone or something demanding our time and more and more of ourselves gets carved away bit by bit until we have nothing else to give to anyone or any thing. We can start feeling dry and barren as if we are in the midst of a desert.

The last time I took a vacation was the week of July 4th, 2002; unfortunately, I also lost my ability to have fun at the about that time. As a result rarely have I been able to laugh. Desert places, forgetting how to have fun, and spending more time protecting my heart from the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune.

The last time I talked to my sister about getting away to some place fun she said I needed to stay in the area and possibility just go to a B&B in a nearby city for the weekend. Dry places, arid places, places without room to really breathe within the parameters of cities or towns; the lights of the city had lost there meaning to me, crowded city streets, one person among the many all pretending civility without ever relating to anyone or anything. Yes it was time to get away; but, not away to some B&B close by, nor the beach which has always been my vacation of choice.

Many times God has put on my heart a message or something to write about but what I have found is articulation for me usually needs a catalyst found in nature to be able to descriptively put something into a tangible form for the reader to ponder instead of just espousing platitudes found in scriptures. Jesus spoke in parables to communicate messages so the reader can relate the spiritual to the natural world. I am not Jesus but with the Holy Spirit’s help and guidance I have learned to wait on the written form of my understandings until I feel I can possibly write the vision and make it plain on paper so those who read it might run.

I told no one my exact destination nor did I have any reservations anywhere, I just knew I wanted to go to the desert and mountains to try to find my heart again and to be refreshed. Sometimes even our Lord Jesus Christ withdrew himself into the mountains to be refreshed and he went into the desert place before he walked out into where Father God was calling Him. Elijah went into the desert to receive the ministry of angels to be refreshed and he heard the voice of God giving him his next commission in the still small wind. There are many scriptures where God drew His beloved into the desert to give the beloved a new heart. For months I have researched desert places, mountain places, heart places and my path was long ago planned when my heart was ready to receive what God wanted me to receive.

Driving towards Abilene I was stunned by the fall foliage and its beauty. Funny but my street is lined with trees showing fall foliage which I can view the from my living room window; but, somehow I had become stuck in the mundane activities of everyday life and had lost the appreciation of even what I could see on my own street. God needed to take me out of my environment to re-instill the appreciation of even the simple things at home.

Past Abilene the fall foliage disappeared to give way to rolling prairies where harvest had already taken place. The view impressed upon me that after harvest time how barren everything looks, yes the soil looks rich but the land has nothing growing on it. After a harvest the barren land has to be tilled and seed replanted to produce a new crop. The Bible speaks of the harvest to come and everyone gets excited but have any of us thought about once the harvest is in how barren the land will be without anything left to promote growth?

Everywhere I looked was dry river and stream beds. The drought in Texas is very real. One place I passed had been a lake and there was not a drop of water in sight. Where the lake had once been were buoys sitting interspersed throughout the dry lake bed. We sit in our cities washing our clothes, taking our showers, using our water as freely as we want but unless the Lord gives the rain we very well may be facing some serious conditions in the future. How will crops be irrigated? How will cattle have the hay to eat and water to be nourished? Meat and vegetable eaters alike could be impacted.

Around Abilene and well past Midland is nothing but rolling prairies with a perfusion of oil fields. I was amazed at the population of the pumping mechanisms which have always reminded me of praying mantis in their shape and construction. What surprised me is the fact that a city can actually smell different due to the main industry. Odessa had the definite smell of petroleum and it was just outside of Midland that I noticed both coming and going the definite strong odor of sulfurs.

As daylight was dwindling the first day of driving I was tiring after driving through so vast of flatlands. I drove into Pecos to stop for the night, I could see the Davis mountain range in the distance and I wanted to enjoy my drive through the mountains by day. Motels/Hotels are limited so I stayed at the Swiss Clock Inn, clean and tidy, with Swiss clocks throughout the restaurant. The first night seemed to be all about timing even while I ate dinner and breakfast the next morning. I was blessed I was given one of the last rooms. It is funny how so many people are resistant to getting their AARP card when they turn 50 but I recognized the benefit at the Swiss Clock Inn, $10 off the room charge, 15% off my dinner bill, and breakfast was free.

Up at dawn, what can I say about being a morning person- breakfast- on the road early into the Davis Mountains. I had forgotten how majestic mountains can be, how odd it is that trees can crop out at odd angles, the cactus and century plants dotting the landscape, a runway which would have been hidden at the base of a mountain if it had not been for the plane being refueled by a tanker truck. The road wound around and around the mountains and I was in awe, speechless, and still unable to put into words how being in the mountains somehow changed something inside me which I cannot even put a name or words to. I needed to be in God’s beauty which was not created by human hands and in doing so it was if God reached down and touched something deep inside that somewhere along the way I had forgotten had existed- awe and wonder.

I reached the McDonald Observatory visitor’s center and the 11 o’clock lecture had just started and I slipped in to learn something that I didn’t remember learning about in school. The lecture was on the sun and the slides shown reminded me of a painting that Monet or some impressionist would have done of a field of sunflowers. Beauty I saw in even the creative expression of God in the sun’s surface. We miss the appreciation of what God created because we have gotten so use to referring to the sun without little concept of it’s surface, content, and structure. Awe and wonder again. It was interesting to learn about the magnetic pull of the sun and how it runs in 11 year cycles. The last height of the magnetic pull of the sun was in 2000 and 2001. According to the lecturer in the height of the magnetic pull of the sun the activity is so high that the earth’s weather is more severe in the top of the curve. The lecturer stated that in 2006 the sun is in a low magnetic pull so we are having less severe weather. The next high of the cycle for the sun’s magnetic activity is expected in 2011. At noon 6 of us loaded up on a bus to travel to the top of the mountain and visited two of the observatories which the technology of even the old telescopes is amazing. The vistas viewed at the top of the mountains were inspiring, oh to have had the time, my paint brushes, oil paints, and a blank canvas. Unfortunately I do not have a working camera to have captured the beauty but it is there imbedded in my heart, a perfect afternoon with inexpressible beauty. Thank you God for the eyes you gave me to see the majesty of your creation.

All the others in the bus were staying at a place called Indian Lodge in the Davis Mountains State Park, since I didn’t have reservations anywhere they recommended I stay there. Driving towards Fort Davis I was struck again by the beauty as more trees lined the road in their full fall foliage beauty. The sun would peek over mountaintops hitting the tops of some trees causing a brilliance of golden glory to shine in the leaves, breath taking. Awe and wonder.

Before reaching Fort Davis I found the Davis Mountains State Park and the Indian Lodge that had been recommended to me. The lodge was built in the 1930’s on the side of the mountain sits the adobe lodge with an adobe covered veranda stretching the length on the side of the lobby with a fireplace. My room, which was billed as one of the original historic rooms, opened up on a courtyard complete with yellow fall mums, a water feature trickling, and a well where pennies had been thrown in. The room had a thatched ceiling, hardwood floors, fireplace and Indian blankets on the bed and chair next to the fireplace. Here are the pictures of the courtyard my room opened up to and the interior of my room looking at the fireplace showing the décor throughout the room.


The door to my room. Inside of my bedroom.

The feeling of the Indian Lodge, both inside and out, is that of stepping into some movie set it is so other world from living in the city and our architecture.

As I left the lodge to go back to McDonald Observatory for the evening star gazing there was javelina crossing the road. At night time when I returned there was a raccoon in the courtyard. I saw horses, cattle, a coyote, and deer on my trip.

Living in the city I miss seeing the stars at night so it was with great anticipation I went back for the evening lecture and what is termed “Star Date”. I sat through the lecture which taught us how to use a star guide wheel to locate the constellations depending on our view from the east, west, south, or north. We were then lead up a pathway which was only lit by red lights which do not go up into the atmosphere, these do not cause an inability to see the stars as city lights do. It was very cold and I shivered in my sweater and leather coat. I looked up and again was amazed at the beauty of all the stars that could be seen. That amazement was cut short as the tour Docent started quizzing us like a classroom teacher as she instructed us to point out specific constellations she had talked about in her lecture. The Docent’s constant quizzes and lecture was distracting from the beauty and the ability to just be still and be amazed, instead it was a constant redirection of a thought and eye direction. I was disappointed and descended the pathway early to go in and have some hot tea and dinner in the café located in the visitor’s center.
I was beyond disappointed, just when you are starting to enjoy the beauty of God’s creation it seems there is someone trying to test you and impress you with their knowledge. I wanted to be still in the beauty of God’s creation. I had purchased a ticket for the next session which would be the Docent taking each of us to a telescope to look at individual constellations. I opted out and started the trek back to the lodge, a feeling of disappointment settled in after such a tremendous morning. I had great expectations of what it would be like to be there on the mountain observing the stars.

As I drove back to the lodge the mountains loomed up on either side, darkness was all around, and the winding roads were entirely unlit except for my headlights. I popped in a Miles Davis CD and somehow the jazz fit the setting. The entire trip I had listened to nothing but worship CDs but somehow Miles Davis seemed to fit like some scene of a woman all alone on a dark winding road in the mountains. It was like writing a mystery script as I drove back to my room at Indian Lodge.

Arriving back I decided to retire early so about 9 it was lights out and I hoped the couple upstairs didn’t talk all night long and would retire soon as the hardwood floors creaked as they walked around talking. Originally my thought though was good they are talking something couples so rarely do. As I was beginning to slip into sleep their communication changed rarely noisily into the intimacy of couples and I very quickly became very embarrassed being a single woman committed to celibacy until married. I turned on the news station on TV very loudly hoping the couple would get the message, they didn’t. I called the front desk in my embarrassment and asked about changing rooms, the change would have been an extra charge, without an offer to help transferring luggage even though I asked. Frustrated I slipped on sweats over my pj’s grabbed the room key and went out to sit out on the veranda overlooking the valley, the whole time talking to God about how irritated I was that a perfect day had been ruined by the Docent under the stars and the couple upstairs when all I wanted was to rest in Him.

Sometimes God gives us expectations, lets us down, then puts an uncomfortable situation in front of us because He wants us to move from where we are so He can give us a beautiful gift that fulfills the expectation He had put in us in the first place. I entered the veranda, not a soul was sitting there, there was complete silence, no city noises, I sat down in a wrought iron chair, still talking to God about my irritation. I looked up and was stunned by the special gift God had given me overlooking that valley with two mountains framing a night sky like deep blue velvet where there were a million stars in sight sprinkled like glittering diamonds. It was breathtaking…no docent droning on, no one in the background having conversation. Just a crisp cool night with a beauty that no painting or photograph could ever capture; I sat there still and knew He was God. He had to move me from my plans so He could give me the gift I had hoped for and desired in His way. A gift was given that was so perfect only He could have given it. I got to sit and bask in it uninterrupted. I said goodbye to the Miles Davis jazz mood because awe and wonder were back.

The next morning, after a very quite uninterrupted sleep, I arose very early excited about what I had long planned for the day. By 9:30 I had checked out, after breakfast, and headed down the road to a town called Valentine, Texas. First I drove through Marfa and hit Highway 90 which runs north westerly from Marfa up towards Van Horn. There is an actual town called Valentine, Texas and for a very long time I had on my heart about possibly starting some type of retreat for heart wounded individuals to come to the desert/wilderness and find their heart in Valentine, Texas and find the streams in the desert of our Lord. Little did I know that what I would find in my retreat to Valentine, Texas would lead me to new streams in Him tenderizing my heart to new insight and desires.

From Fort Davis clear to Marfa is sheer enjoyment of mountainside views with roaming prairies interspersed. From Marfa to Valentine are definitely desert scenes with mountain ranges in view from afar on both sides. What became clear to me was the miles and miles of expanse that would take decades to create a border fence between Mexico and our country as proposed by some. Building a fence and the time and expense involved on the vast expanses of land would potentially not protect us in a timely manner. Surely there must be a better way to protect our borders with technology. Only once during the trip from Marfa to Valentine did I see a border patrol pass me.

From just a little research of Valentine I knew only that it was a small community; but the demographics I had read did not prepare me for what I found. This little community is listed many times on web pages as being known as a place that if you mailed your valentine cards to them they would postmark it with Valentine, Texas on it to send to your loved ones. Many times on the web are news reports of this service they provide for lovers everywhere for Valentines Day. This little community of approximately 150 individuals and 55 families have been servicing others for Valentines Day for years but what I found is that those who have been helping others with romance on this day have been overlooked without others caring about their hearts.

Valentine, Texas is more than 100 years old with mostly adobe buildings. At one time this little community boasted of more than 500 residents. In 1931 there was an earthquake that hit the town and every building was damaged. What lines the streets and the community is sad broken down adobe buildings which have been abandoned for the most part. Even the dwellings which are inhabited are sad and shabby looking and discolored with age. Most of the roads are dirt in between the dwellings. There were only two structures in good shape which were painted white with bright red roofs, one of which I could not get to in the distance but I assume it must be a school house from the structure I could. The other building had a stone in front of it identifying it as a veteran’s memorial; on the door was a life size poster of “Our Lady of Fatima”. What I found is that Valentine is under the El Paso Catholic Diocese and is a “Sacred Heart Mission” out of Van Horn. I was disappointed that a church could let such disrepair exist in a community. I drove through twice because I was so stunned by what I had envisioned of the place and what I actually found.

As I drove back to Marfa my eyes filled with tears and trickled down my face. I dabbed my tears away the whole drive back to Marfa. Sometimes we have expectations of what a Valentine would be like and we go forth wanting to embrace it to fill the desert places in our heart and what we find is so broken down that we wonder how something that has deteriorated so could ever be full again. My streams of tears for sadness for this little town were caught up in a bottle by my Lord as I reflected on Nehemiah who saw the broken down and down trodden and he cried out to the Lord because he wanted to help them rebuild.

The best way I can explain it is I felt like Nehemiah I went to the desert to find my heart and the streams in the desert and suddenly I felt renewed and full of the Lord’s presence as He smiled at me because I saw what He wanted me to see in His time and His way.

I stopped again in Marfa for contemplation and trying to decide to stay a few more nights, I had packed clothes to attend church but had yet to find a church that I felt a pull to worship in. I stopped back in Fort Davis and had lunch and reviewed two more places for possible retreats which I had been doing the entire trip. By 1 o’clock in the afternoon I knew I needed to be back to worship Sunday morning in my home church Covenant Church in Carrollton. I drove back and arrived home about 10pm and was in the 9am service Sunday morning with new breakthroughs in my heart, with new streams.

After worship the burden about Valentine still persisted so I went back to the internet for research and found very little mentioned about anything but the Valentine cards; there were for a few sad articles. One was about a hometown boy who had died in Vietnam and another about a young teenage girl who was killed in a car accident last May. As small as this community is surely her death has touched every life. Very little was written about the earthquake except mention in academic papers on earthquakes and the extensive damage to every building. I read how a few years ago that the state had on its agenda to address the poor water quality and pressure in the area but I did not find where there was anything approved or done to address the water issue.

Nehemiah sadness and not knowing who to ask questions of I sat down and wrote a letter to a P.O. Box for the school ISD where I requested understanding of the communities challenges, needs, and circumstances. I pray a response comes to my letter. Once I know please pray about a possible mission trip to rebuild a broken down Valentine deep in Texas. I want to see streams in the desert of love and compassion so a little broken down community can be revived in the joy of our Lord by knowing someone doesn’t just pass by on the other side of the road ignoring their condition as just another dying town. I want them to know there are still good Samaritans.

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