Christian Living

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Larry Lilly's Letter Friday October 27, 2006

I have used the biblical phrase, "A Brother is born for adversity" several times in the last two weeks. This is true and far too many of us want to fudge on our 'brotherly' responsibility to our friends when adversity strikes, and you can bet the farm on adversity striking.

There is another side to friends and adversity that is often overlooked, yet it is experienced by soldiers in time of war, serious sports teams, and all who suffer mutually in different areas of life. This special something is often referred to as 'camaraderie.'

In a letter J. Austin Bennett had a line that jumped off the page and I immediately speared it for use in this piece on friendships.

"The bonds of friendship that are forged in conditions of shared adversity are perhaps the strongest of all."

The truth of Austin's statement is observable in every field, especially any profession, occupation or just plain living that has had its share of trouble. This bond of shared adversity is right on the surface when you talk with people who endured the Great Depression, served in battle during World War Two. I have witnessed an immediate friendship form when two POW's met who had been in Korean prisons. The same is often true when men or women have shared adversity in American prisons. This is one of the reasons parolees are forbidden to associate with other parolees as this bond may be stronger than common sense.

In the Christian realm most of us in Western Civilization miss the bond of shared adversity due to the nature of our brand of faith. (Get along at any cost). Yet the early Christians had this strong bond as a result of the persecution and horrendous privation that came with it. This is often the case in foreign countries today. About the most bonding element we seem to have in our American churches is trauma suffered when someone messes up the monthly covered dish fellowship. This is why our larger churches have paid counselors at the ready. And we pastors who have endured the agony of dirty looks and veiled innuendo concerning our preaching a Bible truth that messed up the desired fuzzy feeling, seem to bond around the Monday morning coffee, though far too many of God's chosen insist on decaf or more correctly, hypocrite coffee. For shame!!

Of course there is real suffering through illness and who hasn’t been around when two strangers, united in spirit by their shared cancer experience set to comparing notes. Joyce reviewed the book "When Life Hands You A Gold Star" for the November issue of Larry Lilly's Journal. The author, Jean Toler is a personal friend of many years and is a Vietnam era Gold Star Mother. Over the years I have been moved to the depth of my soul when around several of these special women. What a sacrifice and what pain they share.

"The bonds of friendship that are forged in conditions of shared adversity are perhaps the strongest of all."

Larry Lilly Copyright © 2006 Use with credit.

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