Christian Living

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Expectations are the standards we hold for ourselves or others. They can be positive or negative. If you expect good, you will look for the good. And when you look for the good because you expect it, you're usually primed to discover it. But when you expect trouble or the bad things, you look for them and find them. The positive or negative things of life do appear to be in direct proportion to our expectations.

We need positive expectations to grow. These are the types of expectations that challenge, strengthen, and nurture. By having positive expectations, they can lift people to new levels of achievement. Positive expectations inspire one to reach for greatness. So, how can one develop positive expectations?

A first lesson to developing positive expectations is to expect the best. Don't expect the bad or negative to happen, but expect solutions to difficulties. Hope is a key to building positive expectations. For instance, if you express failure or discouragement to your child who is getting low grades, you reap the fruit of such expectations. But if you expect the grades to improve, you reap the rewards of your positive expectations.

Some make the mistake of expecting hopeless situations. They even expect tragedy to come! And when it comes, they experience a double suffering. One, worrying about the expected tragedy, and two, they suffer after the expected tragedy comes to pass! No wonder some people don't have peace of mind or contentment.

Expecting the best means care is taken to inspire and encourage. Remain aware of the words or actions you take. To use words and take actions that lead to positive expectations while avoiding those that lead to negative expectations is to enjoy not only a better tomorrow but also today's good.

Another important lesson on building positive expectations is the matter of balance. As in other dimensions of life, balance is always necessary. We all want positive expectations, but we also don't want to dwell on them to the point of ignoring reality.

So, in chasing after expectations for ourselves or others, we make sure they're realistic. Positive expectations need to be tempered by common sense. For instance, expecting to be a doctor by going through 12 to 15 years of schooling is a positive plan. But if one is already 60 years old, that is no longer a positive plan and expectation.

In going after a goal, it doesn't make sense making the same blunders or failures over and over again. You need discernment to find out when your expections become unrealistic or even impossible in your situation. Therefore, it makes sense that you have "plan B" or a back up plan just in case. You can try again by following a different direction. It's a matter of balance and knowing when to take the appropriate paths and use the right tools.

Yes, we can have positive expectations and a better sense of how to view the present and the future. As Dennis Waitley says, "Expect the best, plan for the worst, and prepare to be surprised."

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