Christian Living

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Larry Lilly's Letter Wednesday February 8, 2006

Part of the calling of being a pastor is being willing to help people solve what we now call interpersonal relationships. This often means getting into the middle of arguments which often can be deadly, at least in the figurative sense. You do this in hopes of salvaging harmony in the family and hopefully the church. Sometimes the outcome of such childish arguments can affect the church in an entire area.

When called upon to register an opinion in such arguments it is good to have a set of guidelines to which you adhere as though they were written on Sinai.

One of the most predominate rows that crop up among preachers is the one where a man is on the hot seat and about to roasted alive with years of ministry ruined and observers wonder 'How did this happen?'

The 'how' is usually easy to spot, the 'why' is most often obscured.

How is one of several things; deliberate departure from established procedure, which by the way is the number one cause of airplane crashes. This type of disregard for order and procedure must be brought under control and the offender walks away with his/her head in hand.

The second is the practice of failure to have established procedure written down and suddenly due to other factors making a federal case out of practices that are not within the framework the norm, not in harmony with the procedure of other similar organizations.

The third is also simple as to how. The recognition that current procedure is inadequate and thus a program to implement new more sure procedure and the folks involved throw a fit, as this new control will upset the apple cart.

Each of the above scenarios is easy to fix if the 'why' is right. The why of your attitude toward any of the people involved. If you don't like one will you use any influence you have in an unfair manner? Will you use said influence to settle old scores? When you make a decision will you be honest as to any benefit coming your way, be it financial or replacing one of the people with a person of your choice, which is abuse of trust?

If one of the folks involved is acting in a manner that you would not tolerate in your organization you must be brutally honest as to why you put up with such behavior in another organization, family or church. Will you permit a revered friendship to trump what is deemed as right?

Any hope for a resolution of conflict in squabbles must be accompanied by a commitment to utter fairness in every aspect of the proceedings.

My verse for today is broader than the subject, but it must considered:

1 Thessalonians 2:4:

"But as we were allowed of God to be put in trust with the gospel, even so we speak; not as pleasing men, but God, which trieth our hearts."

Larry Lilly Copyright © 2006 Use with credit

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