Grief

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His hands were cold, ready for cold blooded murder
His eyes were fierce, fiery, ferocious, red, blood –shot
He was drunk with blood, menacing, intoxicated, and ready to unleash havoc.
I was stranded, isolated, handcuffed, abandoned and outnumbered in Kigali
My mandate was frozen, my troops withdrawn
What I saw with my eyes my mouth can hardly tell
Horror of horrors, brother against brother,
Hutus against Tutsis
and the world was asleep aloof
massacre, genocide of unimaginable proportion
millions slaughtered overnight
even the Church sanctuary desecrated
as parishioners rose against parishioners
in the dog eat dog carnage
Why were they so free to do as they pleased?

Rwanda was of no strategic significance,
had nothing to sell and could not buy
shame on us all
bodies piled up like sacks of potatoes
the stench was so bad, it went through your pores
who will deliver me from this sights that I see,
this smell that I smell, groans and cries that I hear ten years on?
That chamber of horrors, full of skulls upon skulls upon skulls
Skulls of children , skulls of adults,
innocent victims of mindless ethnic cleansing
the heart of man is desperately wicked. Who can know it?
The big players pulled out, their tails between their legs
The killing was like tonic. Each death triggered another
All hell broke lose, Rwanda next door to hell
We cringed in deathly silence
as the rebels pounded our hideout
Now suicidal, I can’t live with the pain
and endless spiral. No sleep, I often weep
I feel like ploughing my car into the next bridge

I must be strong. Good must overcome evil.
The Devil must not win
Let there be reconciliation
Forgiveness, rebuilding
Renewed hope
Every life counts-
Soldiers, bystanders, civilians
Yes, paradise was assaulted by the devil
But let it not be an excuse for continued evil.
Let’s forgive each other even as Christ has forgiven us.
If the Lord should regard iniquity, who will stand?

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