Christian Living

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What is Your Kind of Pain?
by Dan Langerock

When we think of pain, the first thought may be a headache or the pain of arthritis. But there are probably millions of types of pain that we just don't realize until we encounter them ourselves or through those we love.

There is relationship pain, maybe a divorce or separation. There is the pain of loneliness after a beloved friend or spouse dies. The sudden demise of a child in a traumatic way like crib death or cancer.

How about the pain of estrangement, like someone going through mental illness or recovery from addiction of some kind? This, also, is a type of pain. Or what about the separation a family knows when a father or mother is in the armed forces, not knowing whether they are alive or dead, and afraid to answer each knock at the door because of the news it might bring.

We all have a type of pain, some hidden, others revealed before the world. The desperate legal battle to save Terri Schiavo is another example of helpless pain. The debilitation of MS or fibro-myalgia, slowly eating away at your ability to care for yourself and function as a normal person. I know of one family who has a pre-teenage girl who has fibro-myalgia. Can you imagine the heartache of this family knowing what lies ahead for their child and being unable to stop it.

God tells us instead of shunting these people aside, help them bear their burdens. There may be nothing we can do in a physical sense, but we can be caring, compassionate in helping them bear their burden. We can offer them our prayers for strength and beyond, lend a helping hand when needed and wanted, listening and empathizing with our hearts.


I cannot say to you, 'Your pain is less than mine with epilepsy, so I am not going to care about yours." Each one's pain is their own because each person feels pain differently. For a person with severe migraines, their world is crumbling around them because of what they must endure each day. But an insensitive person could come up to them and say, "That's not so bad, I or someone I know has this, which is worse than yours." If you have been reading my column for a long time you may remember an article I did about the callous things people say to each other.

The Indians have a saying, "Don't judge a man until you have walked in his shoes". None of us can walk in someone else's life and shoes. We can only feel in part what they are feeling and the same is true for them about us. God says in the book of James in the Bible, "If you judge others, I am waiting at the door to judge you." That's a solemn thought, isn't it?

For a mental exercise, write on a piece of paper all the kinds of pain you are feeling in your life. Then keep going and write down all the kinds of pain you can think of. Keep this on the refrigerator or somewhere you can see it readily, whenever you start to judge someone. If we are judgmental, the Bible says we will get it back with a lot more added. However, if we give love and compassion genuinely, then we will reap these things abundantly also.

It also has to do with the kind of people you associate with. If you are 'hanging out' with judgmental people, you are more likely to become that way also. If you associate with those who are loving and compassionate, then that is more likely to be your lifestyle. This is one of the things people in recovery from addictions must do, find a whole new set of acquaintances and friends to be with or they will probably return to their old lifestyle post haste.


What is your attitude when someone is hurting or in trouble? Are you one of those who care and try to do something about it or pass on by like nothing is wrong in the world? Sometimes life has a way of returning to us what we have given out, and it isn't just judging others I am talking about. Just consider that whatever you are showing to others will be given back to you. If it is meanness, then meanness will return to you. You can go down the list of what you are showing to others, and figure those will be coming your way soon. For whatever reason we show the wrong attitudes toward others, it is time we assess what we are doing and saying.

In the verse I mentioned earlier about burden-bearing, it goes on to say that when we do this, we are fulfilling the law of Christ. The law of Christ is love, treating others with love and compassion as we would want to be treated. Don't be like the crowd in this poem

A Different Kind of Prejudice
by Dan Langerock

A crippled woman
Was walking down the street,
Full of anguish and pain.
But all she got from the callous crowd
Were words of hurt and disdain.

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