Family

Escaping an Abusive Relationship When Mothers Pray

by Author Carmen Love
01/27/26
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As a mother of four small children trapped in an abusive relationship, I deeply understand the fear and heartache that can ensnare us. My own childhood was filled with the sweet sounds of Bible stories and hymnals, lovingly shared by my mother. Her faith provided solace, even as she endured abuse from my father and envious neighbors. Witnessing her resilience inspired me to trust in God, even when the storms of life raged around us. I never imagined that her struggles and the many adversities we faced was preparation for my own future battles with violence.

Each chaotic day with my children felt overwhelming. I cried, prayed, and clung to my faith, trusting in God to deliver us from our pain.

Fearful days- I have come to intimately know the fear and heartache that can ensnare us. My days and nights were interrupted by silent tears, each one streaming down my cheeks as evidence to my despair. Those tears felt like heavy weights, laden with the profound longing for safety and peace. In the darkness that enveloped me, I wrestled with feelings of utter loss and hopelessness at times, wondering if I’d ever escape the nightmare. The environment surrounding me offered no glimmers of hope or relief; instead, it felt as if the world itself had become a paused film, where every moment was frozen in time. I was caught in a cycle of despair, unable to see a path forward, grappling daily with the complexities of my situation.

My experience is not just about my life; but reflects the reality for many who find themselves in similar circumstances. It’s very important to understand that the impact of abuse extends far beyond physical harm; it seeps into every facet of life, leaving long-lasting scars that can take many years to heal.

Every waking moment brought me little comfort. Instead of promise, there was only a sense of emptiness, pain, and discouragement. I yearned for a sign, a whisper of deliverance, but nothing came.
Days turned into weeks, and still, I waited. My heart ached for a glimpse of brighter days ahead. I clung to the hope that one day, things would change, so I kept praying, even with tears flowing down my cheeks. I never stopped praying. Though there were times I felt guilted into staying by spiritual leaders, those who lacked empathy. I know now that it is God's desire for us to seek freedom in such circumstances. In reflection, I realize it was God and God alone who rescued us from despair. Trusting in Him led us to a new beginning, far removed from the darkness we faced.

Pastoral Counseling-I turned to my pastors for comfort but felt guilty for wanting to leave my abusive husband. They cited scriptures like Ephesians 5:20, saying, "Wives submit to your husbands." Their words reinforced traditional roles and made me feel more alone. I realized this was religious abuse. God supports the oppressed and the abused. Psalm 56 tells us He hears our cries. The scriptures clearly show God's concern for those who are mistreated. Luke 4:18-21 announces freedom for captives. Proverbs 14:31 and Matthew 9:13 highlight God's compassion for the marginalized. It's important to know that seeking safety is not a betrayal of faith but a step toward healing. Accepting this truth can lead to a brighter future. And most importantly, remember that you are loved. If I can escape, you can too. Be blessed and stay Safe.

God’s Deliverance
Escaping an abusive relationship is a courageous journey that begins with the powerful act of trusting in God. As an abuse survivor and mother of four, I understand the weight of fear and doubt that can hold you captive. Yet, in those darkest moments, faith can illuminate a path to freedom. Turning to God gives you strength to recognize your worth. He sees you not as a victim, but as a beloved child deserving of love and respect. Embrace His promises; they are your shield against despair. A home is meant to be a sanctuary, a place where a mother and her children can flourish in safety and love. It should never become a prison of fear and uncertainty.When you turn to God, you open your heart to a source of strength that transcends earthly struggles. He recognizes your true worth, seeing you not as a victim, but as His beloved child, cherished and worthy of respect. Psalm 34:17- When we cry out to God, He delivers us from all of our troubles.

Embrace the promises He offers; they are your shield against the darkness of despair. Each word can fill you with hope, igniting resilience within your spirit.

Remember, you are not alone in this journey. God walks beside you, guiding you toward healing and joy. Trust that brighter days are ahead as you lean into His unwavering love.  Hebrews 13:5 God will never leave nor forsake you no matter what the circumstances are. Surround yourself with a community of supportive friends or a faith group. They can uplift you, reminding you that you are never alone. Seek guidance through prayer, letting God’s voice drown out the lies of your abuser. Every day may feel like a struggle, but trust that God is strategically planning your escape. He will guide your steps, providing wisdom and courage as you forge a new life. Remember, each step away from violence is a step towards healing and hope. Trust in God; He is your refuge and strength. Psalm 119:105 His word is a lamp to your feet and a light to your path.

Leaving Safely

One of the most dangerous mistakes women in abusive relationships can make is sharing their plan to leave with their spouse. This seemingly small disclosure can lead to dire, often fatal consequences. Abusers may react unpredictably when they sense their partner is contemplating departure. They might become more controlling, aggressive, or even threaten violence to maintain their hold. If you're serious about leaving, it's crucial to keep your intentions private. Crafting a well-thought-out plan without informing your spouse can protect your safety. Your escape requires careful timing and discretion. Leaving an abusive relationship is a significant step, one that should be approached thoughtfully and cautiously. Always prioritize your safety, and remember that planning in secrecy can be your lifeline.

• Leaving an abusive relationship is a delicate and life-altering decision. It’s crucial to create a solid plan to ensure your safety and peace of mind.  
  Begin by documenting instances of abuse — dates, times, and details. This information can be vital if you need legal protection later.  


•  Next, consider your finances. Open a separate bank account, if possible, and save money discreetly to support your transition.  


• Communicate with trusted friends or family members about your situation. Choose ones who understand your need for secrecy and can provide emotional support.


• Prepare a bag with essentials: clothes, important documents, and any medications you need. Have it hidden in a safe place.  


• When you decide to leave, choose a time when your spouse is least likely to be around. This minimizes the risk of a fatal confrontation.  


•  After leaving, prioritize your safety by changing your contact information and limiting social media exposure. This helps keep your new location private.  


•  Finally, consider getting therapy on a regular basis. or a support group. They can provide the guidance and reassurance needed during this challenging transition. Remember, you deserve a life free from fear. After I escaped my abuser, I sought faith-based therapy for years to reverse the mental damage not only from my spouse but from early childhood years of abuse, and it was the best thing Id ever done.

 Prayer for Safety and Deliverance

Dear Heavenly Father,
I come before you with a heavy heart, lifting up my family trapped in the shadows of abuse. I pray for Your divine intervention, that you may shine a light on my path and guide me toward safety and healing. Grant me the strength to seek help, Lord, and the courage to break free from the chains of fear that bind me. Surround me with supportive loved ones and resources that foster hope and recovery.

Lord, fill my heart with your strength and remind me of my worth, for I am beloved in Your sight. Allow me to feel your love enveloping me day and night, especially in fearful and dark moments, providing a sanctuary of peace amid the turmoil. Heavenly Father, I humbly ask that you send your angels to guard me and my family at all times. We seek Your divine guidance as we navigate the path to freedom.  May your angels watch over us, providing strength and protection in moments of uncertainty. Lord, I ask that You heal my wounds, both seen and unseen and grant me peace in Your arms and the freedom to rebuild my life. In the name of Jesus. Amen.

© Carmen Love January 2026

Author of: They Loved with a Closed Fist: When Love Hurts & More than Just a Pretty Face: Meditations for the Woman in Trauma Recovery

https://carmenlovebooks.com
https://www.amazon.com/They-Loved-Closed-Fist-Survival/dp/B0B92QYYCC
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