Marriage

Three Types of Women by Mike Ramey

by Mike Ramey
09/20/25
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     One of the main lessons I have been attempting to get across the plate to young men can be best summed up by a trip to the KJV Bible. Of course, there are other suggestions and lessons in addition to today’s adventure. One of them being the following for Christian young men: Do NOT consider marriage unless you and your intended are BOTH Christians and are BOTH willing to go through pre-marital counseling with a veteran Man of God at YOUR place of worship.

     The reasoning is very simple. We put more emphasis in this world in studying for a Driver’s License, or for career certification, or for buying a house or car. However, when it comes to marriage—THE most life-changing event in a man’s (or woman’s) life, we like to focus on the Honeymoon before we even have a solid understanding of what marriage is all about.

     Let me drop this in at this point, and you may feel free to mark it. NOT everyone is destined to be married. Let this sink in. Thus, do NOT be swayed by those articles and video clips online—from the woman’s point of view—that there “ain’t no good men” out there. In reality, there are some men who don’t feel led to be married. From a biblical point of view, this is quite natural and godly. The single man can more focus on what God has for him to accomplish.

     Brothers, don’t let social media ‘nag’ you into a bear trap with the WRONG woman.

     I’d like to encourage my readers in taking a REAL assessment of themselves. Strengths and weaknesses. Time alone in prayer before God. Finances and lifestyle. Once you get to that point where you feel satisfied with what you need to do to adjust yourself, the NEXT step is to think soberly and deliberately about the type of woman you need to seek for marriage.

     That’s right: I said YOU need to seek.

     The age in which we live—concerning marriage and relationships—is very anti-God and anti-common sense. From the point of view of social and entertainment media, it is the woman who is the initiator in the relationship, and the man merely serves as a walking wallet, silent hostage, ‘itch scratcher’ and servant—NOT a leader in the home or relationship. “The Friend Zone” is not the prequel to “The Twilight Zone”. It is where a woman ‘parks’ a guy who ‘may’ be marriage material—BUT she can still have her cake and eat it too, confident that once she is ‘ready’ to settle down, that young man whom she parked ‘on the side’ will eagerly be waiting for her; ready to walk down the aisle in a wedding production that rivals the best that Hollywood can offer.

     It is the MAN who is the leader in establishing the dating, courtship and engagement aspect of the male/female relationship. THIS is how God set it up, and this is also how tradition has been carried forth for a number of years with great success. And, my young (or maybe not-so-young) brother, the best place to read the scouting report on that woman who may be right for YOU is your good ‘ol KJV Bible.

     I’ll give you a hint right up front, young man…a woman’s character MATTERS to God, and should matter to you. Beauty fades. As Pastor Wayne E. Anderson once said during a series on marriage: “Cute can’t always cook!” IF a woman fails in the arena of character at the dating level, she should NOT go on to make it to the next level of being your fiancé, no matter what she, her friends, or her social media posts may dictate.

     Character matters in ALL relationships, period—full stop.  The KJV Bible is THE best yardstick for character measurement of women.

     Like it or not, there are more than a few sections of Scripture that get out the magnifying glass on a woman’s character. One of them is The Book of Esther. We’ll be parked here for the rest of our time together. There are three women featured in this well-known book: Queen Vashti, Esther, and Zeresh. Let me lay out a brief character study of these three women:

            *Queen Vashti: Beautiful. Celebrated. Beloved. Her fatal flaw? In Esther, Chapter 1, she was disobedient to her husband, the King—right in front of his leadership team. Queen Vashti thought more of lunching with the women of the royal court rather than remembering that her husband, the king, WAS the head of the royal court. The end result? The good news, she wasn’t executed. The bad news, she was removed from her role because of her threat to the stability of the kingdom AND the stability of homes all over the kingdom.

            *Esther: Even more beautiful. Wise. Firm foundation in God. Upright character—so much so that even the king’s servants took note. Though an orphan, she was raised by her Uncle Mordecai. Was not ‘sleeping around’ in her youth. Not only is this book in the KJV Bible named after her, but she also won the heart of the King, became the new Queen (replacing Vashti) and saved her people from a holocaust put forth by Haman. Her heroics are legendary.

            *Zeresh: Wife of the villain in the story, Haman. Shrewd. Cunning. Ambitious. Was blessed with a fine house and a large family. Her flaw was that she ‘fed’ the evil desires of her husband to destroys the Jews. She arises in Chapters 5 and 6. She hid her wickedness well, letting it out when it seemed to her advantage. Her end? Husband hung. Her 10 sons hung. Her Home and property seized and placed under the control of the very enemy she encouraged her husband to destroy.

     When considering marriage, young men, be careful of the woman you choose. Let the Bible be your guide!  More to come.

     Mike Ramey is a Retired Gospel Minister, KJV Bible Teacher, syndicated columnist and Bible Prophecy Specialist who lives in Indianapolis, Indiana. He is a Circuit rider of the Funky Electronic Frontier. “Ramey’s Encouragements On Marriage” is one of a variety of his columns appearing and abounding in print and cyberspace, written from a biblical, business, and common-sense perspective since 1996. Catch Mike Ramey’s columns on X (Twitter), Substack, Faithwriters.com, LinkedIn and in fine publications like this one! To drop him a line—or a whine—the address is still the same: [email protected]. ©2025 Barnstorm Communications International.