Humor

Having a Brain Can Be a Problem

by James Snyder 
07/06/24
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I have been showing people a picture of my brain for almost a month now. I’ve been having a lot of fun doing it and teasing people by saying, “I have proof that I have a brain.”

In the beginning, I just believed that having a brain would be a wonderful experience for me. Little did I know that having a brain can create certain problems—problems that my brain not only cannot help but has produced.

I don’t think a day has passed, but I have reminded The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage that I have a brain and proof of it. So far, she has gone along with me.

You would think a person with a brain would be able to solve every problem that comes his way. I was to learn that that was not necessarily true, and I have the scars to prove it.

It was Thursday morning, and I was looking for my Bible I used the night before at a prayer meeting. I looked everywhere, but couldn’t find it.

Finally, I asked The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage, “Have you seen my Bible? I can’t seem to find it.”

Looking at me with one of “those looks of hers,” she said, “You have a brain, so you find it.”

I wasn’t expecting that and didn’t know where it came from. She just stared at me, so I turned around and went back into my office. Later that day, I found it in my truck.

Whether I left it there the night before or somebody in our residence put it there to trap me, I don’t know. I will keep a secret about which one I thought happened.

I returned to work, and it was a very good day.

I needed to go to Wal-Mart to pick something up. I looked around for my wallet, but I could not find it anywhere. I usually put it on the counter in the kitchen so I don’t lose it.

Looking at the counter, I couldn’t see it.

Just then, The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage walked into the kitchen. I looked at her and said, “Have you seen my wallet? I thought I put it here on the counter, but I can’t find it.”

There was, again, that look of hers, and then she responded, “You have a brain, so why don’t you use it and find it?”

I was not sure how to respond, so I went on looking for my wallet, and I eventually found it. I was not sure if I had left it where I found it or if somebody put it there to try to trick me.

At this point, I started thinking about all the time I spent boasting and bragging about having a brain and evidence to show that I actually did have a brain. I must say I had a good time during that time. But now, it seems to have backfired on me.

I hate it when something backfires on me in a very negative fashion.

Going to my easy chair with a cup of coffee, I sat down and began looking at the picture of my brain. That was the evidence I needed to prove I actually did have a brain. As I looked at it for a few moments, I began to wonder, why is my brain not working right now?

As I looked at the picture, I thought maybe I had gone too far boasting about my brain. Maybe I should’ve let it go from the beginning. At the time I just thought I was having fun.

After finishing my coffee, I went into my office and began working on a project.

I needed to make copies of my project, but when I tried, the copy machine was not working. I looked at it for a little bit and didn’t quite know what to do. The only one who knows how to make this copy machine work is The Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage.

What do I do now? I need to finish this project, and there is no way I can fix this and get it working.

My only solution was to ask my wife if she could fix the copy machine for me. I didn’t know how to ask her. I knew her attitude all day, and I’m unsure how I could turn it into a very positive position.

Just then, my wife came to my office door and said, “I have some papers I need to copy. Would you mind if I used the copy machine right now?”

My day could not get any better.

“Oh my dear, yes of course, come and use it as long as you want to. I need to go to the bathroom for a few moments, so take your time.”

I knew when I got back, the copy machine would be running.

Walking back into my office, my wife picked up the papers she had copied and was leaving.

“Everything okay?” I asked.

“Oh yes,” she said, “no problems whatsoever.”

I like it when a day ends on the positive.

In my reflection, a verse from the Bible came to mind. “Therefore all things whatsoever ye would that men should do to you, do ye even so to them: for this is the law and the prophets” (Matthew 7:12).

I need to treat others as I would want to be treated.