Family

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In my last article we looked at the origin of the family. We saw that it was created by God, it has purpose, and it has order. In this article I want us to look at the tie that holds the family together. This tie is love. Husbands are commanded to love their wives and the older women are commanded to teach the younger women to love their husbands and their children. Love is the essence of the two great commandments given by Jesus. Without this basic tie any family will be dysfunctional. An understanding of biblical love is essential to the well being of our families.

Strong families start with an understanding of God’s precepts. Jesus summed up all of the law and the prophets in two great commandments: Matthew 22:36-40 “Master, which is the great commandment in the law? Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets.”

A family built around the love of God will stand. Our text says “love the Lord thy God.” Thy is a singular possessive pronoun. This means that the Lord must be the God of each individual in the family. It is a personal thing.

Our love for God is not a superficial love. It is with all the heart – the seat of our emotions. We are to love nothing more than God. It is with all the soul – that which makes us what we are. He should be our life. It is to be with all the mind – that part of us which decides. He should be considered in all of our decisions.

The second of the two great commandments is to love our neighbor as ourselves. Which neighbor is closer than those of our own families? Of course, a family which limits its love to those within the family will not be as strong as one that teaches love for those outside the family.

These two commandments are both equally important. One cannot love God and not love his neighbor who was created by God.

Without love all other things are empty and without value. I Corinthians 13:1-3 makes this very clear: “Though I speak with the tongues of men and of angels, and have not charity, I am become as sounding brass, or a tinkling cymbal. And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries, and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, and have not charity, I am nothing. And though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have not charity, it profiteth me nothing.”

I Corinthians 13:8-13 tells us that everything but faith, hope and charity will come to an end. “Charity never faileth: but whether there be prophecies, they shall fail; whether there be tongues, they shall cease; whether there be knowledge, it shall vanish away. For we know in part, and we prophesy in part. But when that which is perfect is come, then that which is in part shall be done away. When I was a child, I spake as a child, I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things. For now we see through a glass, darkly; but then face to face: now I know in part; but then shall I know even as also I am known. And now abideth faith, hope, charity, these three; but the greatest of these is charity.”

Charity is the greatest of the three abiding things. Paul says that it is childish to seek after the things that focus on self. Children are only concerned with themselves. Mature people look after the needs of others.

This passage teaches that certain gifts will end when “that which is perfect is come.” I believe that this means when the Scriptures were completed. It is not my purpose here to argue this point. What is important is that charity is more important than any or all of these gifts. Especially if we want to have strong families. Charity fulfills the two great commandments.

Charity has right attitudes toward others.

It is kind – Disposed to do good to others

Does not envy – Does not begrudge what others have

Vaunteth not itself – Does not boast or make a vain display of it own worth

Is not puffed up – Does not have an inflated view of itself

Rejoiceth not in iniquity – Hates unrighteousness

Rejoiceth in the truth – Love truth and righteousness

Hopeth all things – Has an attitude of hope (positive) toward all things

Thinketh no evil – Does not assume the worst but assumes the best

Charity acts right.

Doth not behave itself unseemly – Inappropriately

Seeketh not her own – Puts others needs and desires before their own

Is not easily provoked – Controls its temper

Beareth all things – Carries the burdens of others

Believeth all things – Is not overly skeptical of what others say and do

Suffereth long – Puts up with mistreatment

Endureth all things – Keeps on keeping on with what is right

Love is the tie that binds a family together. This is not the kind of love that makes one feel good, it is the kind of love that puts others first. It is the kind of love that looks after the needs of others. It is the kind of love that is willing to sacrifice for others even when they don’t appreciate it. It is the kind of love exhorts others to righteousness. It is the kind of love that disciplines subordinates (children) with an understanding that a little pain now will reap great benefits later.

Dr. Pierre Coovert was saved at the age of 17 over 50 years ago. He has been a missionary, pastor, and evangelist for more than 30 years. He is greatly concerned about the state of modern Christianity and his desire is to see Christians return to the righteousness of the Scriptures. See his blog at http://awaketorighteousness.com

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