Christian Living

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I bet Portland is stunning this time of year. The leaves become red and fight gravity as they slowly fall. I bet that the weather is chilly with humidity hovering like a blanket. I bet that you can see Mt. Hood when it's not foggy and people walk the beach just to hear the sound of the ocean. I bet there are very interesting and stylish people adorning the coffee shops as they blog their dreams and listen to their cool music that I have never heard of. I also bet as great as all of it sounds, it's not as great as it sounds.

I live in place where green grass and trees are a commodity. Seriously, the more trees that a property has, the more money it is worth. I live in a place where I can count on one hand how many times I have seen it rain this year, and when it does rain, I never have an umbrella because I can't justify buying one for three days of rain a year. But when it's raining, I get upset at myself for not buying one. Do you see the constant contradiction that I live in? It's embarrassing.

I live in a place where we have to drive five hours to get to a city with a population of more than 250,000 people. I live in a place where hills are celebrated. The heat is rampant in the summer, and the cold is vicious in the winter. Does my complaining annoy you yet?

Somehow, I have come to reason that if I were to move from this town, this city, this part of the country to some place with more scenery and better coffee shops, that my life would instantly be blissful. For example, my dream move to Portland would involve stylish scarfs, the discovery of new-indie music, and long-walks on the beach. The only problem is that I don't wear scarfs, I don't really like indie music, and I don't even walk around my neighborhood so how would a beach instantly change everything?

My point being that our dream life, the place that we think would make life better if only we were there: if only we made more money, if only we had a spouse, if only we had a new car, doesn't exist. Let me repeat, it doesn't exist. The trap of "if only" is a deadly trap because it allows you to stop living for today and dream of a better day. This trap makes you miss out on life's opportunities today because it just doesn't fit into your dream. Your future spouse, your dream job, your financial break through maybe knocking on your door but you already checked out of real life.

The grass is not greener in Portland. Ok, well it is, but it isn't. Once again I live in a state of constant contradiction. I have come to realize that my "if only" in Portland is more like a mental wasteland. It's a deceptive method to distract me from the vision of God in the present. There is nothing wrong with dreaming. Please dream, dream big. However, we cannot allow our dreams to distort the reality of truth. It's a deadly trap. And it looks a lot like a beach and some mountains.

I live in a place where sunsets are unhindered, one can hear the cheers of high school football games on a Friday night from miles away, and the weather is nothing but sunshine and blue skies three-hundred and sixty days a year. I live in a place where people love to talk, no one is a stranger, and every door is an opportunity to be held open for someone else. I live in place where the grass is greener than any where else in the world, but my water bill might be higher than most.

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