Faith
I was sitting here today in one of the few quiet moments that I have, thinking about the word “faith”. To have faith, according to Webster’s, is to have a firm belief in something, even in the absence of solid proof. When Thomas was asked in the bible if he believed that Jesus had appeared unto the apostles in John 20:24-30, he stated that unless he could see the nail scars in His hands and His feet and put his finger in them, he would not believe. Thomas had to have all of the evidence in front of him before he would believe in the miracle of Jesus’ resurrection. When Jesus finally appeared unto him, Jesus said, “Because you have seen me, you have believed; blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed.” Jesus asked that Thomas believe in Him even though he had not seen all of the evidence.
We can take the story of Thomas and take it one step further. We can apply it to our daily lives. How many times have we been given impossible situations in our lives, only to turn away in defeat? How many times have we told the Lord that because we could not see a way out of the impossible, it was therefore impossible? How many times do we daily tell the Lord that unless we see the evidence first, then we will not believe?
I deal personally with the “impossible” everyday. My son Jonathon was diagnosed as moderately autistic or Pervasive Developmental Disorder sixteen years ago. Since then, we were told by the doctors that he would never walk, run or ride a bicycle because all of the fine and gross motor skills had been developmentally affected. We were also told that he would continue to withdraw from us, preferring to live in his own little world. They told us to place Jonathon within a structured environment as soon as we possibly could so that he could begin learning the skills he needed to be independent. For the first two years of his life, he had screamed constantly. We rarely had any relief. He also did not want to be touched or held close. We had every possible behavior and medical test run on Jonathon, trying desperately to find the answer to his problem. But to our dismay, nothing was found to be medically wrong with Jonathon. He had severe allergies and allergic reactions to food, but his main problems were still behavioral. We prayed, at this point, asking the Lord to give us direction for our special boy. With all of these things against him, how could we possibly succeed without the Lord’s help or intervention?
But Jesus, in all of His mercy and His kindness, began to allow our minds to grasp concepts that would help Jonathon. We realized that if we would allow Jonathon to stay in his baby swing, he would stop screaming. I would lay under the swing and force my hand underneath his bottom – I was determined that my child would become accustomed to the touch of my hand. I did this repeatedly, day in and day out. As he grew older, we would force him to walk by placing his feet on ours and going forward. We would also take a large, loosely woven blanket and place him into the cocoon of the gathered folds. My husband and I would then each take an end and begin to swing our child gently. He would stop his uncontrollable screaming at this point and allow us to calm him down. Each day, we had a set schedule for Jonathon because we realized that he found security in regimentation. Through all of this, we could see no evidence of a faith healing, but Jonathon, through the help of many, was making slow progress forward.
When Jonathon turned five, the school system decided to place him, with our permission, into a special class for developmentally challenged children. The year before this, he had attended an Early Childhood Development class under a Speech label. We were told that he would work out of the new classroom with an aide into a regular Kindergarten classroom. However, they would make it look like they were going by the Individual Education Plan when we were present; but when we left, they would keep him within the special class all day long without allowing him to leave. I kept showing up at odd times, trying to see why my son was screaming that he did not want to go to school. They continuously excused their actions by saying that Jonathon did not want to leave the special class – that they kept him from the general education setting for “his own good.” They finally called me because they stated that they could not get Jonathon to stop screaming.
I walked into a nightmare. They had let my son lay on the floor for over two hours in a fetal position, curled around the toilet. He had laid there in his own urine and feces with no one trying to help. They had too many other children with extreme high needs; and my precious child, who I had tried to protect, had been viciously taken advantage of. Now, on top of his challenges from birth, we were now presented with a new set of problems. He completely shut down at this point and totally withdrew into himself, not speaking to anyone. All of the slow progress that he had made up until this point was for nothing.
I cannot begin to describe my lack of faith in humanity and God at this point in time. I had always believed that we would have rough points with Jonathon, but through faith and sheer tenacity, I truly believed that all things were possible. I remember going into Jonathon’s room the day that I took him home from that awful experience. I lay on the floor beside his bed and wept before God, asking him why? Why did my son have to have something wrong with him that I could not see? I could believe in it more if I could see the physical evidence or damage. I was so angry because I felt that here was a child with so many challenges – why would God allow him to be taken advantage of and abused on top of everything else? Why couldn’t God, with the blink of His eye, completely heal Jonathon, so that we would not have to bear this hurt and this blinding pain? I demanded that Jesus heal Jonathon. I reminded Him that by His stripes we are healed; and if that promise is true, then he was bound by His word to heal my son. I had the faith for the healing – so where was God?
There was so much that had to be repaired at this point with Jonathon. Eventually, with the help of God, I began to accept that Jesus had a plan for our special boy. I had to believe that even though I could not see the evidence, God had a plan. I reminded myself of this daily. I had taken him out of all public school education at this point; and we, as a family, decided that we had to find an answer for Jonathon, even if it meant moving away from all that was familiar. We begin to research, looking for all of the schools within our state that had an exceptional special education program. We found two different cities that offered what we thought Jonathon needed; and within two months, my husband was hired to work within our highest rated option for special education. We left everything we knew and loved, and by faith, started all over for the sake of our child and our family.
Even after we moved, I was still determined to not allow Jonathon back into public school. I believed that God could heal him, but I did not feel that it could happen without my supervision. I contacted a local support group, who eventually helped to convince me that Jonathon needed the beneficial socialization brought about through formal public school education. We could not afford all of the special computers, keyboards or programs that Jonathon needed to succeed. We also needed moral support from others who had been through what we had experienced with Jonathon. I finally broke down and placed him in public school after he had screamed constantly for months. We started over with a new school, new teachers and new ideas. They each had “hope” for Jonathon, and it absolutely amazed me. I had been told by everyone who dealt with Jonathon to only expect the worse. I had been the only person, along with my family, who believed that Jonathon could succeed. But when I had let my faith return and I had believed that God was in control, He allowed everything to begin falling into place.
We again placed our faith in other people to “heal” Jonathon, however. We continued to listen to what they told us, exhausting ourselves and all of our financial resources in an effort to cure our son, eventually totally bankrupting ourselves spiritually and financially. Finally, Christmas 2003, we took Jonathon out of public school and brought him home to be with his home schooling family. We felt that, at this time, we were through with other people’s “expertise”. We were going to listen to our own “feelings” about Jonathon, bring him home to a safe environment, and see what happened. We discontinued all state and local services at this point and moved out into the country where we could start over.
Today, Jonathon has come so far. His progress has been slow, but he is moving forward. He walks without any problems for short amounts of time. He runs with difficulty; but he also jumps and laughs. He loves music and his heroes are his pastor and his daddy - he wants to be just like them when he grows up. He can ride a bike without any trouble at all, occasionally running over his brothers when they don’t move out of the way. He still has problems with the fine and gross motor skills, but there is nothing physically wrong with our special child. If you know what you’re looking at, you can pick up on the repetitive speech patterns and the stuttering. But other than that, Jonathon is physically whole. Behaviorally, he still suffers; but we have learned acceptance of some things and denial of others. We “believe” or have faith that Jonathon will be healed, whether we can see physical evidence or not. We “believe” that he was placed with us by a huge God that has a wonderful plan in place for each of us. And we “believe” that all things are possible, and that “faith” is the substance of things hoped for but not yet seen…
PLEASE ENCOURAGE AUTHOR BELOW LEAVE COMMENT ON ARTICLE
Reader Count & Comments
Date
The opinions expressed by authors do not necessarily reflect the opinion of FaithWriters.com. This is especially true with articles that
deal with personal healthcare and prophecy. We encourage the reader to make their own decision in consultation with God, His Word, and others as needed.
This article has been read 484 times < Previous | Next >
Read more articles by tanya ross or search for other articles by topic below.
This article has been read 484 times < Previous | Next >
Search for articles on: (e.g. creation; holiness etc.)
Read more by clicking on a link:Free Reprints
Main Site Articles
Most Read Articles
Highly Acclaimed Challenge Articles.
New Release Christian Books for Free for a Simple Review.
NEW - Surprise Me With an Article - Click here for a random URL
God is Not Against You - He Came on an All Out Rescue Mission to Save You
...in Christ God was reconciling the world to himself, not counting their trespasses against them... 2 Cor 5:19
Therefore, my friends, I want you to know that through Jesus the forgiveness of sins is proclaimed to you. Acts 13:38
LEARN & TRUST JESUS HERE
FaithWriters offers Christian reading material for Christian readers. We offer Christian articles, Christian fiction, Christian non-fiction, Christian Bible studies, Christian poems, Christian articles for sale, free use Christian articles, Christian living articles, New Covenant Christian Bible Studies, Christian magazine articles and new Christian articles. We write for Jesus about God, the Bible, salvation, prayer and the word of God.