Marriage

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Every Christian is in a relationship with God, Jesus Christ, Holy Spirit and the church (body of Christ). Whenever there is a conflict, we don’t discard such relationship, we restore it. Restoration means bringing back to the original state.
God has given the Christian the ministry of restoring relationships (2 Corinthians 5:18).
Restoring relationships is an invaluable skill among the people of God.

a. Tell God about the conflict First

If God is your best friend, it is natural that anytime you are hurting that he would be the first to know. Don’t gossip about the crisis and conflict but talk to God about it first. Tell God your frustrations, anger, hurt, insecurity or any other emotions concerning the disagreement. Confess your own faults too.


b. Search your Conscience

When you are serious about restoring a relationship, you must begin by admitting your own mistakes or sins (Matthew 7:5). You will be better positioned and justified to remove the speck in another’s eyes after removing the log in your own eyes.
You may need a third party to evaluate your actions and words before meeting with the person with whom you have a disagreement. Ask God to reveal to you your own faults. Don’t make excuses or shift the blame. Accept responsibilities for your flaws and ask for forgiveness.

c. Always be the first to seek Reconciliation

It doesn’t matter whether you are the offender or the offended. God demands that you make the first move. Don’t wait for the other party for blessed are peacemakers for they shall be called the children of God.
Broken relationships whether between spouses; children and parents; friends or colleagues; or sister and brother, destroys your worship and relationship with God; blocks your prayers and makes you miserable. Schedule a face-to-face meeting as soon as possible. Delay only deepens the wounds and makes matters worse. Time causes hurts to get worse.

d. Attack the problem, not the Person

There is a difference between fixing the problem and fixing the blame. You must choose the former. Choose your words wisely when fixing the problem. Don’t be rude, offensive or sardonic.
In conflict resolution, how you say a word is as important as what you say. If you say it offensively, it will be received defensively.
Don’t use hurtful words but helpful, soothing and healing words.
Don’t delay another second. Pause right now and talk to God about that person and the problem. Then pick up the phone and begin the process of reconciliation.
Remember that only those who pursue peace and holiness with all men can see the Lord.
See you at the peak of a healthy relationship.

Recommended Books:

The Secret of Supernatural Power, Deliverance and Prosperity

When Trusting God Makes No Sense

Breaking the Hold of Self-Slavery

Stop Existing! Start Living!

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