Fairytale of a Lover
by Cristy Zinn
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Once upon a time lived a girl. This girl longed for love and so she went in search for it. Her search for love was misguided. Entirely, completely and regrettably misguided. She had gone down dark corridors and back alleys, looked for quick love and intense love and regretted each bad choice she made. She regretted it so much that she gave up her search entirely. Still she found him. Or perhaps he found her…
A day came when she sat licking her wounds over some flame that had yet again rejected her – used her and discarded her like a pair of filthy socks – and it occurred to her that her every waking moment had been consumed with finding this perfect love that no one seemed to have. No one else lived happily ever after and she wondered why she had assumed she would. What she saw was so obviously to the contrary that she realised she had been mistaken in believing the fairytale. It was all lies. There was no such thing as true love. In fact on that particular day she was beginning to doubt in the existence of love in any form, never mind true love.
It was then, at the very moment when hope left her and defeat set in, that she heard the voice so loud and clear in her head that her mind spun. I adore you, it said. I adore you because I made you. The words lingered over her like a soft perfume. I love you because I made you for me and me alone. I want you – as you are – because you are mine. Like a kiss lingering on her cheek, like an embrace, like a caress. The voice wooed her.
She felt as if she had gone completely insane from lack of love that she was hearing such voices in her head and yet she knew this voice. Tears flowed because she could not stop them and did not really want to. Grief and joy mingled in her, a bitter-sweet realisation that she had a lover whom she had forgotten entirely in her search for love. The lover of her soul.
My bride, I have longed for you. My child, I love you. You are the reason I… images of his death flooded her mind and her tears turned to sobbing. He had died for her and she had forgotten him. But he had never left her and she realised that now. She had a love. She had been looking all this time and it was always within her.
Welcome home. He said and she was overwhelmed.
Her love for him grew from strength to strength. She hungered for him and in him her hunger was satisfied – no other love had ever satisfied, not like that. And so she forgot about her chase after “love”, she knew that her life was in his hands. But as she drew nearer to him and pleased him he gave her what she had never imagined she would have. A man. An earthly love.
The man, who loved God as much as she did, loved her as she only hoped she would be loved. He urged her on towards her true love and took each stride beside her. When she thought she might burst from the overpowering sense of blessing she felt, God blessed her again, with more love. A new love - With children.
Every time she drifted and went in search of some other love, her true love would come and whisper in her again: my love, you are mine. And she would turn back and have her hunger satisfied by the only love that could satisfy. She often looked back at where she had been, looked back at the failed journeys to a fake love and praised her true love for finding her when she thought she might never have love. She knew that for eternity she would be able to experience love because her lover had made a way to erase those past failures – he had made her and was sure to pull her back into his arms when she had run away.
And she lived happily ever after…
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What a beautiful testimony! John 15:16-You DID NOT CHOOSE ME, but I CHOSE YOU! Yes, He chooses us and what a blessing that is to KNOW that He chose us. Love, sharon
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