Fresh from the Brewer
by troy brewer
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FRESH FROM THE BREWER
"The Jarhead Review"
I don’t think you will ever see Roger Ebert and Troy Brewer on the same TV show talking about the latest at the theater. Although the new wide screens might accommodate us nobody wants to watch two fat guys jawing at the same time.
Movies are a huge part of our culture and I see a lot of them. I like movies and I like different kinds of movies. As a Christian I have decided there are certain lines I don’t cross so there are tickets I will never buy but that doesn’t mean I ban the medium altogether.
A movie can be cutting edge without being vulgar like in “Lord of the rings.” It can have strong and scary content without being explicit like in “The Missing.” It can have professional cops and shootouts without being full of offensive language as in “ The fugitive”. It can even have a high body count with out being improper and still be a good movie like they managed in “Tombstone”, and “We were soilders”.
I am a Christian in a secular world and culture and I understand that when I go to the movies I am not in a Christian arena. However, You don t have to be a Christina to have a brain or to be decent. Sometimes I will come across a movie that is so offensive it makes me want to gather other angry peasants with pitch forks to burn the Hollywood castle down. This happened to me last week.
I made one of the worst mistakes of my young life last Friday night and spent eight hard earned dollars on what I thought was going to be a pro-marine war movie called “JARHEAD” It should of been called jar-jar binks head!
I had seen the trailers with Jamie Fox and it came complete with burning desert scenes and a short speech that ended with a “hoo-ra”. I was ready to raise a flag.
What I did not know is that the godless, Americana haters that made this optical septic tank, could not be honest about the movie they had made, so they portrayed it in another light to get my eight dollars.
Had it not been deceitfully advertised and honest to the actual content, the trailer would of sounded something like this.
Come see a movie that will grieve your spirit and make you want to take a shower afterwards. Be entertained with the forever use of the F-word and the mythical idea that there is no such thing as a professional American solder that actually knows why he is going to war. Be amused as these mindless hormones taunt innocent, Iraqi women with horrible, vulgar gestures. Let every liberal bone within you be pleased as these same savages will defile Iraqi corpses, stop a football game to have homosexual sex with each other and masturbate as often as they drink water. Learn that every American wife is a prostitute and unfaithful to husbands that go off to war. Yes bring your family!
Anybody with a right mind that is not making a suicide bomb and planning a Jihad would not pay money to see that kind of movie. The producers of the film (and I use the word film in the same way I would describe the yellow layer on my teeth) knew the previous fact and was smart not to be upfront to who they are.
The fact is there is not actually any war in this “Gulf war” movie. No scratch that, there are two blink-and-you-missed-it war scenes. One is when the mindless and incompetent American Military kills their own Marines by an A-10 that flies like the pilot is drunk. Then there is the other war scene where we see the aftermath from the savage Americans turning on fleeing and innocent civilians.
Nothing about anything real that actually happened in the Gulf war that we watched live on CNN. Nothing about the liberation of Kuwait. Nothing about the coalition of multiple nations from all over the world. Just a sick and profane portrayal of mindless American solders in a bloodthirsty fraternity of latent homosexuals. I was not impressed.
This movie is vulgar, rude, obscene and offensive to anyone with a conscience and without one redeeming virtue. Oh you will hear that the cinematography is great and yes you will be stunned if you have never seen sand before or pornography or full frontal nudity of lots of guys in a never ending shower shot. Wow!
It offers not a single positive portrayal of a professional Marine or recruit. It slanders the Marines and the Military in general including the generals. It makes weak minded people think those that served were idiots. It is designed to rall up that socialist/terrorist part of you and make a stand against anything red, white and blue.
JARHEAD will be a huge hit in Iran, Syria and the Palestinian controlled parts of Israel.
Oh, I’m sure it will go over big in Boston, Washington State and the northern part of California too.
I give this movie a thumbs down while pointing my index finger toward the word of God and I say “Do not be deceived, my beloved brethren”. (James 1:16) Jesus said that in the last days men would call good evil and evil good.
In this day where we literally say something is “Bad” meaning it is actually good we have a fine example of portraying a righteous cause and the dedicated selflessness of solders as something terrible and vulgar. Don’t buy it and don’t pay for it at the movies.
The American military is still an honorable profession full of disciplined and moral men and women and if you don’t like them you can kiss their military grits!
Semper Fi in Jesus name.
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