Premarital Sex Can Destroy Your Future Marriage
by Edward Mrkvicka
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Premarital sex is in conflict with the Word of God. “But fornication and all uncleanness or covetousness, let it not even be named among you, as is fitting for saints;” (Ephesians 5:3 NKJV)
And lest we think that fornication is of no afterlife concern, we must refer to 1 Corinthians 6:9-10. “Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals, nor sodomites, nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners will inherit the kingdom of God.” Simply put, unrepentant fornicators will not spend eternity in heaven. The matter is that serious.
While the spiritual concerns are of the utmost importance, I want you to consider another important aspect of the issue. That being, premarital sex is a destructive force that could destroy your future marriage.
The divorce rate in America has eclipsed 50%. Those are not good odds. To put the number in perspective, would you get on a plane if you were told up-front that there was an over fifty percent chance the plane would crash? One would have to be insane to take that “bet.” And yet we do so with the most important personal relationship we will ever have. And we spread the results of those terrible odds to our innocent children who are far too often the ones hurt the most when a marriage collapses.
There is no reason to go into all the negative results of a broken marriage, as we know them all too well. It has either happened to us personally, or we know someone who has gone through the horrendous experience of divorce. Many never recover.
The point is, it is obvious that it is a worthy undertaking to do whatever we can to give our marriage every possible chance of success. And one way we can do that is to abstain from premarital sex.
We must also briefly remember the negative affects of fornication by and of themselves. There is our growing illegitimate birth rate, that in some communities is over 70%. Then there is the plethora of STDs. And the growing number of single parent households that are a drain on our society’s very financial existence. Not to mention the damage done to children brought up in homes that lack a father’s presence.
But what harm can premarital sex do to our marriage after we’ve sown our “wild oats” and settled down?
As many people can attest, our past can destroy our future.
Do you know why gold is so expensive? Because gold is scarce and scarcity has value. Conversely, when something is abundant, it is virtually worthless.
Being sexually active with numerous pre-marriage partners ultimately makes sex with our spouse nothing special - he or she is just another in a long list of people we’ve been physically intimate with. So if our marriage doesn’t work out, it’s not a problem - we’ll just go out and find another person to have sex with - and maybe marry. But what if our spouse is the only person we will ever have sex with - would our marriage be more valuable? Wouldn’t we work harder to save it if it was in trouble?
Our permissive society scoffs at abstinence and faithfulness. You know, “The kids are going to have sex anyway, so let’s make sure they have condoms.” Boy, there’s some dedicated parenting. And once we’re married, “Everyone commits adultery, what’s the big deal?” As if we can excuse bad behavior by citing the bad behavior of others.
Marriage has been consistently and systematically cheapened. Moral standards have declined to the point where they are virtually non-existent. No matter how you feel on the subject, we should be able to agree that what we’ve done to the sanctity of marriage is not working. That is beyond obvious from both a secular and spiritual perspective.
Lastly, I beg you to consider the importance of making love to your spouse while others are just having sex with another sex partner they just happened to marry. And then ask yourself if your marriage will have more chance of success if your marital sex life has the value of gold - or tin?
Ed Mrkvicka is an award winning Christian author, lay minister, and lifelong Bible student.
His newest book, “The Prayer Promise of Christ,” has just been named Christian Book of the Year by Books & Authors.net.
His web site is located at: www.EdwardFMrkvickaJr.com
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From one who has been married for 50 years I agree with the guideline you have written in this article. We can't walk in holiness if we purposely live against His principles. Florence Simmons www.common-sensewisdom.com