Previous Challenge Entry (Level 4 – Masters)
Topic: REMEMBER (02/03/22)
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TITLE: A letter to Auntie | Previous Challenge Entry
By Corinne Smelker
02/10/22 -
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Dear Auntie Diabolica:
Thank you for your last email – the whole high church versus the happy clappy people was well received by my circle of demons, and we’ve working on our charges assiduously since then. It’s so much fun confusing and confounding them!
Auntie Diabolica, I need your wise counsel, and keep this under your horns – no need letting it out to others I am having trouble.
My blasted homo-sapien, despite all my nudging about how great it would be to sleep in on Sunday, or meet that smart set for brunch, or to join a sports group that meets on Wednesday and then plays on Sunday, has not only made a commitment to attend her church every weekend, but then joined a small group! Not sure if you have heard of this thing down in the 10th level of hell, but it’s where like-minded people get together, open that awful book and then study it! Why, I mean, why? What do they get out of it?
I know Our Father Below has stipulated we should not read Our Enemy Above’s words, but I wanted to see what was intriguing my stupid mortal. Do you know there is a whole section where the Enemy’s son tells these bodies to eat bread and drink wine in remembrance of him?* What the heck?
But you know what the issue is? She does this ‘communion’ thing with her small group every Wednesday and, I swear to Our Father Below, she changes! There is a glow about her. And the worst thing? I can’t get through to her mind as easily! It’s like she is protected. I’ve tried my old standbys, I’ve tried the subtle approach, I’ve tried the direct approach, but nothing is working.
I ask, not because I am scared for my future (perish the thought, although I have it on great authority Our Father Below gets irate if we lose one of our charges to the Enemy at the end of their short, miserable lives) but because I want to do the best job I can with her before she passes from this mortal coil. Her spending an eternity in everlasting turmoil is my deepest desire.
But how we do overcome this ‘eat my body, drink my blood in remembrance of me’ travesty? It’s just bread and wine (or grape juice) they are consuming. How does that affect them? She eats bread and drinks wine plenty of other times and it does nothing.
So, how do we make her forget Our Enemy? He is so insidious – he makes my blood boil. Do you have ANY tips or tricks? This has likely been going on for 2000 years, ever since Our Enemy’s son caused havoc down below. What did you do? Seeing you are the head lecturer of, “Everlasting Forgetfulness: A Class in Spiritual Amnesia” I hope you have something I can work with.
Please email me soonest. And I said, please keep this under your horns. It’s bad enough that I am still trying to live down the scandal of my human getting water baptised, no one needs to know she is now going to Our Enemy’s building even more frequently!
With all my love,
Your niece, Strumpet
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A different take on C. S. Lewis’ ‘The Screwtape Letters”. Instead of the senior devil providing insight, the junior devil writes looking for help.
*Luke 22:19-20
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