The Official Writing Challenge
BACK TO
CHALLENGE
MAIN
INSTRUCTIONS
how it works
submission rules
guidelines for
choosing a level
ENTRIES
submit your entry
read current entries
read past entries
challenge winners
Our Daily Devotional HERE
Place it on your site or
receive it daily by email.


TRUST JESUS TODAY

  • Share
  • how it works
  • Submit
Previous Challenge Entry (Level 4 – Masters)
Topic: START (02/25/16)
Our Father Which/Who Art
(Confessions of a stuttering mind)


"Our Father Which art,"


(which is it? Who or Which?)


start over


"Our Father Who art in Heaven, hallowed,"


(thoughts immediately jump to "Harold" sounding like "hallowed" - funny little kid's delightful mispronunciation)


start over


"Our Father, Which is in Heaven, hallowed be Thy Name, Thy Kingdom Come,"


(what's that aggravating sound? Another nasty little mouse scritch-scratching in the dresser drawers? Should get a ferocious saber-toothed cat, with a patch covering one eye . . .)


start over


"Our Father, Which/Who art in Heaven, hallowed be Thy Name. Thy Kingdom come,"


(oh boy, I can hardly wait. To sit at His nail-savaged Feet and just adore Him, ask Him all the questions in my aching heart . . .)


start over


"Our Father, Who art in Heaven, hallowed be Thy Name. Thy Kingdom come, Thy Will be done on Earth as it is in Heaven. Give us this day our daily bread and forgive us our debts,"


(debts or trespasses? "As we forgive our debtors," debtors or trespassers? And dear Lord, it is so hard to forgive vicious people who deliberately hurt me. I'm only human. I know that I must learn to forgive - I cannot even forgive myself . . .)


start over


"Our Father, Who art in Heaven, hallowed be Thy Name. Thy Kingdom come, Thy Will be done on Earth as it is in Heaven. Give us this day our daily bread, and forgive us our debts as we forgive those who trespass against us. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil."


(This isn't right - how and why would our Almighty Father God lead us into temptation? Translation error? I must check this out first thing in the morning . . .)


start over


"Our Father Who/Which art in Heaven, hallowed be Thy Name. Thy Kingdom come, Thy Will be done on Earth as it is in Heaven. Give us this day our daily bread, and forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors. And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil. For Thine is the Kingdom, and the Power and the glory forever - amen." (whew . . .)


I better start over -too many interruptions that do not honor God. Why is it so hard to simply say the Lord's prayer through? This is so frustrating . . .


..............................................................................


Beware of vain repetitions, advises me to myself. The Lord's Prayer is not a mantra, not a thing to slough through to get to the end. We are not told to pray this prayer word for word, but to pray in this wise/manner.


I have lived most of my Christian prayer life enslaved to this repetitive habit. Bright car lights flashing through my bedroom window, dancing across the walls interrupt me.


start over


Sometimes I fall asleep in the middle of the prayer and feel guilty. I must wake up and


start over



I live with Fibromyalgia and Chronic Fatigue. Good reason/rationale/excuse? I think I like my Go Bible (like an MP3 player with earplugs echoing His thoughts into my scattered brain) - taking my whirligig thoughts to focus them on God's Holy Word - placating His and my desire for precious time with Him.


Dear Heavenly Father, please forgive me for stumbling through what should be wondrous time with You. Thank You for loving me enough to send Jesus to return me to You. I get confused and upset and forget Who I am talking/praying to. Please instill in me a quiet, less neurotic spirit to worship You in the glory You deserve . . .


Also, dear Lord - please forgive me for putting capitalization on all the words in the title of this article - only Your Name and Title should have that honor, but I am bound by English law to put caps on each word in the title, I think?

..............................................................................


A blushingly too true story . . .
The opinions expressed by authors may not necessarily reflect the opinion of FaithWriters.com.
Accept Jesus as Your Lord and Savior Right Now - CLICK HERE
JOIN US at FaithWriters for Free. Grow as a Writer and Spread the Gospel.
This article has been read 1160 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
C D Swanson 
03/05/16
Fibromyalgia is so complex and only those who have it (I was diagnosed 23 years ago)could understand the debilatating effects it could have on so many levels.

I related to this and I thank you for your honesty and for sharing with us.

Blessings~
Bonnie Bowden 
03/07/16
Even without Fibromyalgia, my mind at times wanders through the Lord's prayer. Your piece is a good reminder to really think about and celebrate time with Christ.
Shann Hall-LochmannVanBennekom 
03/07/16
You make some great points. I enjoyed your subtle sense of humor, I get it. What's even cooler, God gets it too. :)
Jan Ackerson
03/07/16
I liked this quite a bit, especially the first two thirds or so. That was very compelling reading, and the choppy style fits the content perfectly.

After the first division, it got a bit more rambling. I realize that rambling was the entire point, but you went from addressing your reader to addressing God, and that was a bit disorienting. And I felt that the ending (feeling guilt about capitalization) was a odd one.

Each criticism in the above paragraph could easily be countered with "But that's the point--my condition makes my brain jump around." I get it--but the key would be to find a way to keep the reader compelled, too. The first part of your story did that very well.
Danielle King 
03/07/16
I love the end results of your whirligig thoughts and stuttering mind. I identify with you always, and what you write never fails to make me chuckle. As Jan said, maybe you shouldn't have mentioned the article, as it's a no-no if you hope to be published. Other than that I enjoyed the story of you, being you, as always!
Bonnie Bowden 
03/10/16
Congratulations, Judith, on your 5th place EC award. Your story really got the point across.
Noel Mitaxa 
03/10/16
Creative and very candid work. I like your thought about this prayer becoming a mantra despite Jesus' lead-up to it.
Could I also caution against too much guilt about falling asleep in a prayer (providing it doesn't become a habit) for it may conversely indicate complete relaxation in God's acceptance and submission within his presence.
Yours 'heretically,'
Noel
C D Swanson 
03/11/16
Congrats!
Blessings~


P.S. "I agree with Noel's comment about relaxation in His presence...so true!"
Danielle King 
03/11/16
Congratulations Judith, on a well deserved placing. More of the same please.
Bea Edwards 
03/23/16
Delightful self dialogue dear!