The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
02/28/14
Wow - Simply brilliant! I loved the analogy and the symbolism in this fabulous entry.

I loved it, and what a joyous conclusion. Pure genius.

God bless~
Wonderful analogy in beautiful words--with a great message.

03/01/14
I had no idea where this was going until you revealed it. Well done. This was a very touching angle on the topic. I love when entries are Biblical without being super heavy. Thanks for sharing this with us.
03/01/14
You set the scene and very cleverly built the suspense with descriptions that still didn't reveal where you were taking us. But I loved the analogy as you tied in the scriptural truth. Great work.
03/01/14
WOW! What a brilliant poem and superb analogy. I agree with CD - pure genius!
03/04/14
I love this sort of poetry and you have written a masterpiece in my opinion.

I know that red ink helps both you and I to improve, but I really am struggling to find anything here to improve. The only thing I see is that, for me, it's not quite on topic.

Getting the short end of the stick implies doing everything right, being in the right place, but getting a disproportionate result.

The bulb eventually learnt a great Scriptural truth; but missed out because of himself rather than getting the short end of the stick.

Like I said though, thats only how I see it and the poem itself is brilliant.

"Out of the sight of old barn door" was an excellent line.

Blessings.
FANTASTIC! I came to FaithWriters from FanStory, which has a majority of poetry. This is one of the best I've read.

Your words were painted on the screen, not typed. What a beautiful image you created.

I haven't read the rest of the entries, but this is a winner.

Blessings,
Dusty
03/06/14
This is simply marvelous in message, meter, flow, and poetic elements. The fear and hiding were tangible. All I can say is "Wow!"
Congratulations on ranking 8th in your level and 11 overall.