The Official Writing Challenge
This article has been read 674 times
Member Comments
Member
Date
08/03/13
A good story. I noticed you went from "I shook his hand " to "Lucy look around"....other than that I think this is a very good piece with a powerful message. Blessings.
08/03/13
Now that I read it over again, I think maybe you were showing both personalities? If so, scratch that first comment. My addle minded brain did not catch it at first. Great writing.

Blessings, Lynn
08/03/13
Very unique story! Becoming a Christian and growing in Christ certainly is like getting a personality transplant…only that is only the side effect of our soul conversion! Liked how you showed the different examples of what non-Christians and Christians look for in life in this sci-fi like analogy. Enjoyed the read.
08/04/13
This is a creative way to approach the topic and you've done it well. I did notice a change from the first person (I) for Lucy to the 3rd person (Lucy, she)which was a bit confusing. Otherwise, a good message, and well told.
08/05/13
This was a very clever approach to the topic. I thought it was interesting, and I really didn't see where it was going, so I was surprised at the ending. Nicely done. And, boy...the Christian model, is certainly a "classic" today, in all aspects of which you could imagine.

I enjoyed this. Thank you.

God bless~
08/05/13
This was an excellent story that showed both sides of Christianity, hypocrisy and compassion, with a heart of Christ.

This reminded me of a modern day version of the "The good Samaritan Story" where the least expected provided help.

The heart is not a respector of persons, when it is a heart reflective of Christ.

Great job...I loved it.

God bless~
08/05/13
Ooops so sorry!!

That second comment was supposed to be on another entry! Please excuse it.

God bless~
08/05/13
Oh wow -this was priceless.
I kept wanting to skip to the end but I'm so glad I waited! Phenomenal way to wrap up your story. Well done.
08/06/13
How very creative. I knew we weren't talking about cars but I had no idea what else it could be. You've done a great job with this one.
08/06/13
Very interesting, and at the same time baffling for most of the way. I was thinking can it be cars? Well done!
08/08/13
Congratulations Vince. A great story.
08/08/13
Great job on this and an excellent "example" of writing toward the topic. I love the way you ended this. Congratulations.
08/08/13
Yay Vince,
Congratulations this was one of my favorites.
08/08/13
Congratulations! God bless~
08/08/13
Congratulations on your win Vince! Kudos!
08/08/13
Congratulations on your well-deserved 2nd place.