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Previous Challenge Entry (Level 3 - Advanced)
Topic: Postcards (08/29/05)
Once upon the time in the beautiful small town one girl lives. Her name was Jenny. She was 8 years old. She hasn’t any brothers and sisters. She lives with her parents in not big cosy house. She hasn’t a lot of relatives but her mother has a younger brother who works a captain on a huge ship. Jenny almost didn’t remember her uncle. On Christmas her family gets amazing presents from he – there were a photos of exotic birds and buildings, nice shells, wood boxes with candies inside, strange toys, beards and others. Once they received a large mask of African god.
On the last Jenny’s birthday the postman brought another box from uncle.
With becoming transfixed of her heart she opened a box. Uncle Max always sent so unusual things!
On the floor of box she found exotic candies. She put one into mouth immediately. Deliciously. She continues to look things in box. She noticed several postcards under all. There were four colorful postcards with different sighs.
On the first an old castle with peaked roofs and stone towers was painted. In the round window one of them there was light.
On the second card she could see a big elephant which stood near the banana palm-tree and tried to take bananas from the top of one.
From the third postcard old man was wearing a cloak look to her attentively. He had a long beard and kind eyes.
On the last picture she saw the old door decorated inscriptions in not understanding language.
The more Jenny looked at the picture the more they looked like strange. She fixed her eyes on the picture representing a door.
Suddenly, the not understanding power pulled her inside the picture…
Jenny wasn’t in time for frightening. She found herself standing in front the door. She pushed the door. The door has been opened easy. Jenny saw a narrow street of old town. Smell of food. She sniffed attentively – something familiar.
She started move in direction to place where the smell was. She has seen the old brick house. In small window it was light. She has been given the brave. She knocked on the door. “Come in!” Young voice invited her.
She came in a small cleaned kitchen. In oven the fire was dancing cheerfully. The man turned around.
“Uncle! What are you doing here?”. “Happy birthday, Jenny”. He looked at her and winked to her.
Then they ate a delicious food, drank tasty drinks and talked. She has known that her uncle was a wizard in the mystery country. He worked Master of the Weather. He made wind, clouds, rain, snow and other.
They talked about two hours. Finally her uncle said “You should come back, Jenny”.
“But uncle! Let me remain for a not long time!” “Not now, Jenny, but….” – he winked her artfully. “Now you know where I live."
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Member Comments
Member
Date
dub W
09/05/05
Find someone to proof your story, there is a message here, but it needs to be put in a different form for readability - at least for me. Thanks for posting.
Anna Meadows
09/07/05
Yes, you need some help with your sentences. But you are beginning to think like a writer. Thanks for sharing.