The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
10/26/09
I grew up in those turbulent times, and I so much appreciate the way the world has changed.

I'm wavering over your use of the n-word. Despite its realism for this setting, it's a volitle word and maybe too harsh for this site (and you spelled it wrong). But I certainly understand its inclusion.

Good job with the flashback/flash forward structure.
10/26/09
It is obvious that you have no prejudices when it comes to race, because you didn't spell the N word correctly.
10/26/09
regarding a previous comment...i suspect the misspelling was deliberate to help portray the ugliness of those beliefs. either way it was a great story. wonderful job of going back and forth between scene points.