Previous Challenge Entry (Level 2 – Intermediate)
Topic: Life (06/15/06)
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TITLE: Marching Moments | Previous Challenge Entry
By Anna Gane
06/19/06 -
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Swiftly marching by,
Like autumn’s gold rimmed clouds in
Rosy evening sky.
They glimmer with heavenly light
Before they die,
To kiss the setting sun
and murmur a swift good bye.
Life is marked by fleeting moments
Of day and night;
Marching across the sky of life
Like clouds of white.
Each moment a rare and
Costly jewel of light,
To spend in careless wrong
Or live in careful right.
How swiftly each dear moment
Is passing us here!
How brief this life we pass below
On earthly sphere.
Often fraught with sorrow
And many a time with fear.
But Jesus’ comfort, peace,
And joy are always very near.
Life is living each moment for
Christ who set us free;
Making every moment count
For all eternity.
Serving each other with tender heart
As would He,
If He were here below in place
Of you and me.
Oh, may each moment count
For Christ who loves us still!
To do His precious work
And work His glorious will.
That when life sets in heavenly glow,
We may still
Know with joy our Father’s plan
We did fulfill.
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Your imagery in stanza two is marvelous. I like this: "fleeting moments
Of day and night;
Marching across the sky of life
Like clouds of white." Once your readers taste that level of wordsmanship, they'll be hungering for more. To make this piece really stand out, you might want to develop the same wonderful word-pictures in every stanza. There are many, many ways to say the same thing; and in poetry the sky's the limit as far as word-painting goes!
Excellent entry--keep writing, have fun, and you'll soon be moving up!
Rosy evening sky.
They glimmer with heavenly light
Before they die,
To kiss the setting sun
and murmur a swift good bye."
Beautiful! May all our moments glow with heavenly light and kiss the "Son" with obedience born of love before they say good by, leaving eternal value and life behind.
Thanks for reminding us how each and every moment is a precious gift! Good job!
And work His glorious will."
A delightful, soothing piece. Great work!