The Official Writing Challenge
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Member Comments
Member
Date
10/19/06
I loved the ending. The connection between the son and father by that line "Name's Sergeant O'Leary, If Ya Please." I found that the distinct similarity between the father's death and the situation where the son was shot was a little hard to be believe. But overall, execllent writing. Keep up the good work.
10/19/06
Yes, this is the way a narrative story should be told. Complete to the end, a perfect construction. A winner in my estimation.
10/19/06
Excellent, and good job with the Irish brogue. Be careful of lie/lay, the only glitch I found in this touching piece.
This is a really touching story, with a good, easy flow. I LOVE the ending!
10/20/06
Excellent atmosphere and dialogue to a well written story. Gave me a few chillbumps along the way to the ending - and that's not bad! Well done!
Loved this story-and the ending. Great job, the title caught my eye.