TITLE: The Movies
By Christian Stafford
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1: Christina – control freak.
2: Josephine – needs to be right
3: Julia - a romantic – dreamy, blonde.
4: Morgan - addicted to movies etc. Very smart.
1: Let’s go and see a movie.
4: Yeah. I feel like some visual stimulation.
3: I want to see something romantic
2: I don’t want to see anything suspect.
1: Like a detective movie, we couldn’t see one of those, that would be really suspect I guess.
3: Or a relationship movie because there might be a break up and on of them might suspect there’s a secret lover.
4: And I suspect you two are extracting the Michael.
4: taking the Mickey.
1: taking the mickey out of 3? She’s got no Mickey left to extract.
2: Are you saying there’s someone inside me called Michael?
3: Oh how romantic! Michael Keaton. You could talk to him anytime. All the time. All night…
4: This is getting unhealthy. Your imagination’s getting you frothy at the mouth 3. Stop mixing your metaphors or you’ll get in trouble.
3: In trouble? Pregnant? To Michael! Oh how wonderful!
1: Stop this right now. Take your pills please 3.
2: She’s the absolute limit. I’ve never been with anymore so conversationally unsafe.
4: She’s wide open. Very broad minded.
1: Yeah that’s why her brains fall out if you corner too fast!
3: That’s an insult! My head is screwed on very tight.
4: But to what? Your cell phone?
2: Don’t criticise her anymore. It’s not right. 3, we all apologise. We behaved in a wrong way.
4: I don’t, she’s being a dork.
1: I unreservedly apologise as long as she stays on track for twenty minutes.
3: I’m always on track.
4: That’s the trouble, you’ve got a one track mind. Girl’s magazines and Mills and Boon. O.K. O.K. I’m sorry.
2: We should all speak nicely to one another. And we should go and see a wholesome movie.
1: Yeah like the Sound of Music. Good one.
4: No way! Let’s see the new Star wars Movie.
2: The power be with you! I mean what is that all about? It’s very New Age. That’s spiritually very suspect.
4: Wherer’s the suspect. I thought we weren’t going to talk about detective movies.
1: No one else has a sense of humour here 4. It’s waste of breath.
2: You guys think you’re so smart.
1: Look greater is the spirit within us than the spirit of the world. What have we got to fear from some kooky New Age ideas?
2: They’re evil. They take you over.
3: Then what are we going to see?
1: Well detective movies are out, we can’t see a romantic movie unless 3 is blindfolded and put in a sack, 2 won’t watch anything nothing unwholesome, I dunno what’s left.
3: There’s only one film left. Star wars episode number whatever.
2: I’m not going to see something that won’t edify me.
1: Come on. It’s O.K. My father thinks it’s fine and he’s a pastor.
4: yeah my mother does too and she makes Pasta.
2: Oh everything’s just a big joke. It’s no good. I won’t come.
1: Well what can you see that won’t taint your pure mind? Mary Poppins?
1: The teletubbies?
2: I can’t see what I want to see. Why should you all get a choice?
1: You know very well why you’re restricted. Your parents have told us to stop you seeing that stuff. We are under strict orders. You are a romance addict and you have been told not to see anything that will start you off.
2: You’re probably all as bad as me in other ways. We should all have to see something we all hate. At least it’s fair.
1; You know that’s a very good idea. I mean let’s think of the most bland wholesome movie that we would least like to see and go and see it and really enjoy hating it.
4: I agree. Let’s entertain ourselves by seeing something extremely un-entertaining. We could gnash our teeth and vomit everywhere.
2: That’s disgusting.
4: I agree.
1: Let’s just accept that’s everything’s bad for us except things that are boring. Then we can all live safe boring lives and do nothing that we enjoy in case we get excited and start to breathe.
2; You’re purposely misunderstanding what I’m saying. I’m just worried that something might corrupt me.
4: Hey don’t live in fear. We do not live by the spirit of fear by the spirit of love and something … and a sound mind.
1: Yeah for it is for freedom that we have been set free.
3: Wow is that in the Bible?
1: Of course.
2: Then I should be able to see romantic movies.
4: All things are permissible but not all things are good for you. That’s a paraphrase.
3: You guys really know the Bible. Maybe it is O.K.
1: Look it’s your conscience. But it would be nicer to go together. And see something we all don’t mind seeing.
4: I’ll stuff peanuts in your ears if I hear anything naughty.
2: Oh thanks. O.K. Hey let’s go. I don’t have to feel so afraid anymore.
1: hey look there is one really dangerous thing about scene three. The animals all wear braces. That’s really dangerous, it’s giving them human characteristics..makes you think they’re human beings, my little brother went around talking to dogs and cats for weeks after, we had to put him on Ritalin.
2: really! That’s creepy, like a conspiracy.
4: Yeah the animals are taking over, at night they crawl onto the roof of my house and call down the chimney to us, telling us they’re going to take over the house and put us all in the kennel and feel us dog biscuits.
2: That’s a real worry.
4: yeah it’s called animalism, it’s really New Age….(Curtain)
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