Humor

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Every year about this time, a friend of mine always says, "If March comes in like a lion it will go out like a lamb." I would not mind it so much if I knew what in the world he was talking about.

That is the thing about friendship. We allow people to go on and on about something without the slightest notion of what they are talking about and yet, we most heartily agree with their opinion. I suppose that is why we are still friends. We put up with their eccentricities in hopes that they will reciprocate.

Friendship like this is the perfect example of Ying and Yang, and I'm not even Chinese, although Egg Foo Yong is not so bad and I can play chopsticks on the piano. To put it in language I can understand, there is a little bit of me in thee and a little bit of thee in me, so it hardly behooves me to speak ill of thee.

I suppose when we think of the lion and the lamb we are thinking about opposites. The lion is facing one way and the lamb is facing another way. Then somebody will say, "Well, opposites attract." I suppose they do, but what in the world do they attract? And why should I be interested in it?

I think when my friend is talking about the lion and the lamb is referring to the fact that the month of March is full of opposites. But in my book, they are not very attractive.

On the one hand, you have a cold blistery reminder of the winter that has just passed, and on the other hand, you have the slightest indication of the warm weather to come. Both are a handful and if I had another hand, I would give it to the person who came up with that idea.

I'll tell you what my frustration is. As soon as I am adjusted to a certain situation, it changes on me. It is not that I have anything against change, I simply hate it. And the lion and the lamb represent to me change. The only change I really like is the change rattling in my pocket. But keep that between us and do not tell the government. After all, they are extremely interested in change, particularly our change.

It was the Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage who brought this to my attention just last week. I was trying to figure out my friend’s "in like a lion and out like a lamb" proposition when my wife made a proposition of her own. Normally, I like propositions. But her proposition was not to my liking because it represented change.

"It's spring," she observed as though I did not know what time of the year it was, "and I think it's time to clean out the garage."

Speaking of the lion and the lamb, she was acting like the lion and I was supposed to act like the lamb and follow her roar. However, between the roar of the lion and the confusion of the lamb, I did not know who or what was coming or going. I know who wanted to go, but being the gentleman that I am I held my peace. I'm not quite sure how long I can keep holding my peace, after all, it is getting a little heavy and I'm not getting younger.

It seems to me, it was this time last year that my wife mentioned that the garage needed to be cleaned. And if memory serves me correct, the year before that the same thing occurred. And the year before that. And honesty compels me to admit that I cannot think of a year that this was not true. Somebody is in a rut.

I guess the person was right who said that the more things change the more they remain the same. I would not make any accusations but I think someone is trying to pull the wool over my eyes.

But another old saying we have is that turnabout is fair play. The problem with that is that I’m turning about so much I'm getting to feel rather dizzy. Sure, I could see where the garage should be cleaned like last year, but this year I'm putting in for a change. It is my turn to be the lion and I say this year we will be different and not clean the garage. I know it is a radical change. But then, turnabout is fair play and I want to be fair if anything.

I like what King Solomon said in the Old Testament. "To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven:" (Ecclesiastes 3:1 KJV). The seasons come, the seasons go and the more they change the more they remain the same.

Nobody knows how many springs have come and gone since the beginning of time. And nobody can calculate how many more. But spring will follow winter, winter follows fall, fall follows summer, summer follows spring and we are back were we started in the beginning.

The only time we really have is, now.

"(For he saith, I have heard thee in a time accepted, and in the day of salvation have I succoured thee: behold, now is the accepted time; behold, now is the day of salvation.)" (2 Corinthians 6:2 KJV).

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