Christian Living

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One Sunday morning a while back I was sharing some key principles with our church about serving the Lord and being obedient to His calls in our life. It went something like this...

1. When God's call comes, it will never come at a convenient time.
2. God's call rarely comes with all the details in place.
3. You will never feel fully qualified to answer God's call.
4. When God's call comes, you will almost always lack the resources to do it.
5. But... God's faithfulness always outweighs the risk of the call.

When I first began teaching years ago I prayed a simple prayer, asking God to always keep me real and never let me teach from His Word without living it out in my own life. Between you and me, there are times when I almost wish I hadn't prayed that prayer, because God continually gives me opportunities to "practice what I preach" if you know what I mean, and sometimes the lessons are pretty painful.

A few months ago, Sandy and I received a phone call that we knew right away was going to have huge implications -- very difficult ones -- on our entire family. This change of plans that had just been dumped on us couldn't have happened at a more inconvenient time... Caroline was only days away from starting high school and Nick was getting ready to start middle school. So, as a family, we had been mentally gearing up for having two kids start two new schools, and two new "levels" of school. "And now this, of all things," I thought.

Ever get selfish? Ever get upset when your plans get interrupted? Yeah, it was one of those times.

So there I was, all bothered by this huge extra load which was, by that time, less than 24 hours away from landing smack in the middle of our lives. And when it did hit, it brought with it all the stress I had anticipated... and a whole lot more that I had not even thought about. There was no denying it. This was going to be tough on all of us.

I was not happy. I gritted my teeth and braced myself as best as I could. My one goal was just to get through this until it was over, and then our lives could get back to normal.

I was completely missing the point! Completely.

God allowed me to stew for an entire week. And then it happened. Driving in my car the following Friday morning, minding my own business, God started preaching my own sermon back to me... you remember... the one I mentioned a few paragraphs earlier. That one. God said, "Phil, I've brought this into your life to give you an opportunity to serve me. Are you so selfish that you can't give up your life, your plans, your comfort in order to be Jesus to somebody else? Are you only interested in serving me when it's convenient?"

Those words kept playing over and over again in my head for I don't even know how many more miles, until at last I was overwhelmed with conviction and sadness over my own failure to see this "inconvenience" as an invitation to be a part of God's mission. I pulled off into the first parking lot I came to and sat there for several minutes settling this matter with the Lord. How could I have been so blind?

And then I called Sandy. I said, "I need to tell you something. I've been a real jerk about this whole situation. Instead of seeing it as a chance to be used by God, I've only seen it as an annoyance. I want you to know that I'm sorry for that, and I now accept this situation as a call from God to minister for Him."

In her usual graciousness, she waived her right to say, "Yeah, you have been a jerk..." Instead she said, "It's okay, Phil. This really is a hard situation for our whole family, but I'm convinced that God brought this into our lives so that we can show His love to these hurting people." And once again I was smitten by her gentleness and mercy.

Frankly, I'm embarrassed to share this story with you. I'd much rather tell you about one of the times when I did everything just right and came out smelling like a rose. (I'm sure I can think of one if I try hard enough... give me a minute.) I mean, I'm a pastor, for crying out loud! We're supposed to be perfect, aren't we? You know, have answers for every theological question, be able to fix everyone's problems, part the Red Sea... that sort of thing.

Well, I shared this with you to encourage you. My guess is you've had a time or two where you totally missed an opportunity to be Jesus to someone who was hurting because it was not a convenient time in your life. But you know what? God is not going to wait until we've got all our ducks in a row before He calls us to step out and do something for Him. That's why it's a bad idea to say, "Lord, I'll serve you when I'm retired and I have more time... or when I have more money... or when my health is better..." The truth is, we won't, because there will always be some reason why "now" is not a good time to drop what we're doing and obey God. We tend think that if things were different we would be more faithful. That's a lie. As someone once said, "If you can't be faithful where you are, you won't be faithful where you ain't."

I almost blew this opportunity to serve the Lord. I'm glad He snapped me out of my funk and lovingly "tanned my hide", as my Dad used to say. I can be so selfish at times, and I really hate that about me. I honestly do want every moment of my life to be used for God's glory and for His Kingdom! And you know the best part about this whole thing? God actually used this "inconvenience" to begin healing an area of my own life where I had been hurting for a long time. So, let me get this straight... God took what I saw as a bad situation, and ultimately used it for my good to mature me and make me stronger? Huh, imagine that!

We sang a song in our worship service last Sunday, and the words are truly the cry of my heart. It said:

Heal my heart and make it clean
Open up my eyes to the things unseen
Show me how to love like You have loved me
Break my heart for what breaks Yours
Everything I am for Your Kingdom's cause
As I walk from earth into eternity

Thank you, God, for your everlasting patience with me. Thank you for never giving up on me, even when I act like a jerk. Thank you for the incredible privilege of being a part of your Kingdom work. And thank you, Sandy, for teaching me what it truly means to lay down my life for others. You amaze me.

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