Cults

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Wherefore,
thus says the Lord God;
Behold,
I'm against your magic bands
with which you hunt the souls.
[Ezekiel 13:20]
*************************
(A Scientologist has lived a
very plentiful, and rich life;
he's had one mansion in Vale,
and another in Beverly Hills,
to call his home. Fortune,
travel, and elegant fare
has adorned his plate,
for many years. There's
just one catch: he died
one moment ago, and now
he's confronting the Master
of All Science.)
____________________
"HEY!
Where AM I?
What is This Place?"

"Here, child.
[PAUSE.]
In front of I AM."

"WHO?"

"Me;
[LONG PAUSE.]
your Lord."

"Uh....I don't believe in
that stuff.
(Smile, fold arms,
and lift his handsomely
coiffured head. Looks
for the time on his
six thousand dollar watch,
but only sees his bare wrist.)
Never did.....what the...!
HEY! Did you just take my WATCH?"

[NOD.]
"No, child.
But, I took your time."

(Squint in confusion.)
(Feels for glasses, but
they are gone. For some
reason, though, he can
see perfectly.)
"What's going ON?"

"Me, child.
You just died."

"Hm, hm!
I have the best DOCTORS!
I'm paying a FORTUNE....!"

[NOD.]
"Yes, I know.
It's a shame."

"I don't UNDERSTAND?
Who are YOU?
Where's my ATTORNEY?"

"Sorry, child.
You don't get one, Here."

"It's cold in Here!
Is this a bad DREAM,
or WHAT?"

"Hm, not a 'what', son.
More like a 'Who.'"

"I don't BELIEVE You!
(Smirk.)
I never did!"

[NOD.]
"Yes, I know.
I've given you many opportunities;
remember that time at the
basketball game?"

(Pause.)
(Thoughtful moment.)
"You mean, at the CHAMPIONSHIPS?
When I sitting right up front,
in the celebrity SEATS?"

[NOD.]

"Yeah....now, I remember!
There was that guy, some
cousin my ex-wife had invited
to the party......boy, was HE
a ditz! I almost had him
thrown out by the one 'a
my bouncers!"

"Why didn't you, son?"

"Eh..... he wasn't worth it!
I was half drunk, anyway;
he actually had the nerve
to ask ME if I was goin'
to HEAVEN!
(Laugh!)
Can you BELIEVE?"

[NOD.]
"And, what did you say,
son?"

"Can't remember;
I'm sure it was somethin'
sarcastic. Can't stand
people, like THAT!"

[NOD.]
"I know.
[SIGH.]
It was I Who sent him."

"But, WHY?"

"Because, My child;
I love you."

(Stunned silence.)
(Looks around for a chair
to sit on, but there is none.)
(Tired of standing, shrugs,
and plops down on the hard,
cold floor. Frowns, as
immaculately designed trousers,
and thousand dollar shoes
get scuffed. Decides to take
off shoes. Digs into trouser
pocket for expensive sliver
of a cell phone, but it's gone.)
"You love ME?
But........I don't even know
who you ARE!"

[NOD.]
"Yes, My son.
I know.
I am going to tell you.
[LONG PAUSE...FILLED WITH
GREAT SADNESS.]
Only, now.... it is too late."
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Therefore
you shall no more
see delusive visions
nor practice
divination;
I will deliver
My people
out of your hand.
Then you will know
that I am
the Lord.
[Ezekiel 13:23]

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