Gospel

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(Author's note: 'meshugunah'
is Yiddish for 'loco': 'crazy'.
Now you can say it in 3 languages!)
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In the days of Herod,
king of Judea,
there was a priest
name Zechariah....
and he had a wife...
her name was Elizabeth.....
But they had no child...
and both were advanced
in years.
Now while he was serving
as a priest before God.....
it fell to him by
lot to enter the temple
of the Lord and
burn incense.
[Luke 1:5-10]
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"I never heard of this story, Lord."

"Which, child."

(impatient sigh)
"THIS one;
the one about John the BAPTIST."

[PATIENT NOD.]

"I always thought he was
some guy from the 1700's.
You know; he started a
new religion, or somethin."

[VERY PATIENT NOD.]

"Well, where was I gonna'
learn it: in HEBREW school?"

"I know, My precious."

"He sounded like he was
meshugunah, poor guy."

[SMILE.]

"And, I don't understand
his parents; why didn't they
prepare him for a better
vocation?"

"I prepared him, child."

"Why did You give him
such a strange appetite....
eating BUGS?"

[LAUGH.]
"Because,
I am the Lord, child."

"Yeah. Well......it sounded
like his father had a good job.
It's a shame....."

[INFINITELY PATIENT NOD.]

"And, why was that angel
so MEAN to him?"

"To whom, child."

"To his FATHER!
To ZECHARIAH!
I don't UNDERSTAND."

"What of it, child?"

"Well, this ANGEL;
what was his PROBLEM?"

[LAUGH.]
"Tell Me, child."

"I don't KNOW;
it just seems like
he was real touchy.
Why did he get
so mad at Zechariah;
I don't understand?"

"Who was the angel, child?"

"Huh? Eh.......oh,
it was GABRIEL!
I thought he was
supposed to be NICE?
What was wrong;
was he in bad mood,
or somethin'?"

[SMILE.]
"Who was he, My precious?"

"WHO? Eh.......I DON'T know.
I've seen pictures of him
with light curly hair. And, he
was a big, tall guy with
these HUGE wings.....
Didn't he work for YOU, Lord?
I mean, wasn't he one of Your
MESSENGERS?"

[NOD.]

"Well......I guess he was
just carrying out Your orders.
But, it STILL seems kind'a
mean."

"So be it, child.
I am the Lord."

"Is that how You treat ALL
of us, who don't have
enough FAITH?"

"Sometimes, child.
Yes."

"Oy vey."

[SMILE.
NOD.]
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And there appeard to him
an angel of the Lord
standing on the right side
of the altar of incense.....
Do not be afraid, Zechariah,
for your prayer is heard....
your wife Elizabeth
will bear you a son.....
Zechariah said....
How shall I know this?
I am an old man, and
my wife is advanced in years.
And the angel answered....
behold, you will be ....unable to speak
until ....these things
come to pass.....
because you did not
believe my words.
[Luke 1:11-21]

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