Christian Living

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Larry Lilly's Letter Friday August 10, 2007

My grandson, Brady, will be nine this December and he has now taken up a study of the Civil War. He asks a million questions, alright, 999,000. Due to influence at school he thinks Saint Andrews' Cross means the person waving it is for people having slaves. I did manage to find something redeeming in the little guy, he loves Robert E. Lee and his horse, Traveler. He has watched Kenn Burns' DVD's on the War of Northern Aggression until he knows the next scene by heart and vociferously proclaims, "Grand Pa you have got to see this next part."

I am glad he likes the General as now I can use the grand character of General Lee to teach Brady some pretty good lessons. The example of the Northern counterpart may lead to alcoholism.

In a letter to his son General Lee stated:

"Never do a wrong thing to make a friend or keep one; the man who requires you to do so is dearly purchased at the sacrifice. Deal kindly but firmly with all classmates; you will find it the policy which wears the most. Above all, do not appear to others what you are not."

I can think of no person who will not benefit from heeding the above advice. That we live in a compromised era is beyond dispute and most agree that the pressure to 'purchase' friendship or promotion is out of control.

I personally know several men and a few women who committed crimes that led to a stretch in prison and in the gut wrenching time of paying for their crimes they did not express animosity toward the system or the judge, but rather at themselves for being weak and giving in to the pressure of people they had held in high esteem. One of these men, whom I will call Bobby, was of Italian heritage and one of the neighborhood men was charged with a crime. Bobby served on the grand jury investigating him. In the course of events the accused asked Bobby what was going on in the jury room. Bobby, against his better judgment and the law, told him. The neighborhood Don, then admitted his guilt and told the FBI about Bob's conversation. The original bad guy in this story ended up serving two years while my friend Bobby served every day of 10 years!! Long story, but worth the read when you realize that caving into any sort of peer pressure will have a price. And any pay, be it money or a warm fuzzy feeling is not worth the cost. I understand Bob is now home and doing well. Bob is not his real name.

General Lee's advice to refuse to appear to be what you know you are not is needed in most clergy circles as we fall prey to this temptation regularly and more often than not, dive into the stalking temptation and lie like a rug about our plans, attendance, and or finances. I know at least one clergy person that while ministering in a building that would cater to 80 people claimed to have baptized 2500 people in one year. Strange though it be, no one believed him. His need to appear to be the incarnation of his idol/clergyperson overrode any thread of common sense and with it his credibility.

Larry Lilly Copyright © 2007 Use with credit.

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