Devotionals

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Psalm 139, Vs. 1 “O Lord, You have searched me and known me.”

O Lord, you have searched me ...

ME: You have looked into the depths and the shallowness of my being. What were you looking for? What did you find? A man crying inside? A man full of fear and doubt? Did you find my hopes and dreams or my sinful and selfish desires? Were you looking for Jesus? Was he there? Please tell me, Lord, what did you find when you searched me? Then again, do I really want to know?

GOD: Son of My Heart, I do not search you to pass judgment on what I find. I’m not looking to see if you are lacking or failing in some way. I search you for the purpose of knowing you. I search you because I delight in you. I’m not looking for failures or fears or wounds or wrong motivations. Yes, those things are there, and I want to heal and transform them, and I will; but that’s not what I’m searching for. I am searching for you, the man I created. I want to gaze on my beautiful workmanship. I want to hold you in my hands and rejoice in what I have made. I love my work, and I search you to enjoy what I have made.



Psalm 139, Vs. 2 “You know when I sit down and when I rise up; You understand my thought from afar.”

... You understand my thought from afar.

ME: What is this “from afar” business, Lord? Why do you understand my thoughts from afar and not from near? Is it because my thoughts are so much lower than yours that you can only understand them from afar? Is it because my sins have so separated me from you that you stand far off to consider my thoughts. Please show me, Lord.

GOD: No son, I am not aloof, standing above you to judge your thoughts. My thoughts are higher than yours, but that does not mean I look down on you. I value your thoughts because they are part of you, and it is you I seek to know and love. Nor am I keeping my distance because of your sin or any shortcoming on your part. I died to take care of those shortcomings that kept us apart so that I could draw near to you and dwell in you. I am not put off by the residue of sin, sorrow, or brokenness. I draw close to heal those things and set you free. When I understand your thoughts from afar, I am simply stepping back to get a better view.

When you examine your thoughts, you tend to use a microscope. Have you heard the phrase “the devil is in the details?” Satan loves to nit-pick your thoughts and accuses you on every detail that might be a bit off, and you often listen. I prefer to look through a wide-angle lens and understand your thoughts in the whole context of who you are: your wounds, your disappointments, your sorrows; also your joys, your gifts, and your dreams. I know you are but dust; I made you, remember? But I happen to love this bit of dust. I understand your thoughts far better than you do because I step back and understand them in the whole context of my creation, of which you are a vital part.



Psalm 139, Vs. 3 “You scrutinize my path and my lying down, and are intimately acquainted with all my ways.”

You scrutinize my path …

ME: What is this path of mine? Is it the path of my life, the road I have traveled to get to where I am? The thought of you scrutinizing my path conjures up images in my mind of the nit-picking judgment you descried as the devil’s way. I know that is not you, Lord. What is it you mean by this scrutiny?

GOD: No, Son of My Heart, judgment of where you have been is not what I mean. I am glad you are getting to know me well enough to discern that that was a lie of the enemy. The path that I scrutinize is not where you have been, it is where you are going. I know the plans I have for you, plans to bless you and not curse you. I know there are blessings in store for you on your path, but I also know there is an enemy who wants to steal those blessings. And there will be obstacles you will have to overcome. The path you will travel is full of both blessings and trials. It is these I scrutinize. I have seen and considered every pitfall and every turn. I will not allow the enemy to tempt you beyond what you are able to bear, and I will be with you so that, though you may stumble, you will not be cast headlong from the path. I will not always make the way smooth and clear because I want you to learn to lean on me through the dark and difficult places. Trust me in this, I have scrutinized your path and there will be nothing that I will not use to strengthen you and push you closer to me.

… and my lying down …

ME: You scrutinize also my lying down. Is this speaking of places of rest or places I’ve made my bed and now have to lay in it? Show me, Lord.

GOD: Dear Son of My Heart, I scrutinize every aspect of your life, but as I have said, it is because I love you. It is not to judge or condemn you, but to guard and protect you and to deliver you from the schemes of the enemy. But there is also another way I scrutinize you. I scrutinize you as an artist scrutinizes his work of art, looking for those places that are not yet complete or not yet as beautiful as I wish them to be. I see places of sin I can turn into righteousness and places of sadness I can turn into joy. I am still looking at the big pictures, understanding you from afar; but at the same time I scrutinize the details, not as the enemy does to nit-pick and accuse, but to perfect the work I have started.

I scrutinize both your path and your lying down: the places you are moving forward and the places you have stopped; the places you are active and the places you are at rest; the places you are doing and the places you are being. The places of your lying down are as important to me as the paths you walk to get there. Like those I met on the road to Emmaus, I am with you on the way, revealing things to you and opening my word to you; but it is in the inn, the stopping place, where I become known to you in the breaking of the bread.

… and you are intimately acquainted with all my ways.

ME: Intimately acquainted – wow! How can I wrap my mind around that? I know, Lord, that you are omniscient, that you know everything about me, my history and my future, my accomplishments and my failures. Nothing I think, do, or feel is hidden from you. But knowing you know those things isn’t enough. There is something more here, isn’t there?

GOD: Yes, Son, there most certainly is more than mere knowing. Knowing touches your head, I touch your heart. I don’t just know about you, I am intimately acquainted with you. I am involved, connected, and committed with you. When you think a sinful thought or listen to a lie of the enemy, I don’t just know about it, it profoundly affects me. You see, I have chosen to be connected to you. I offered you my life, and you received it, then you offered me your life and I received it. That was real, not just some religious idea. Your life and my life are now intimately connected. When you hurt, I hurt. When you are blessed, I am blessed. When you make choices that are contrary to my nature, you feel conflict and distress inside you because my nature is inside you. I feel that conflict, too. It hurts both of us. When your thoughts and actions are in harmony with my nature, there is peace and joy for both of us, and we share it. This is this intimacy that I crave. It is also the intimacy you crave, because it is what I created you for.

When you received me and I received you, it was the whole ball of wax, the total package. I am intimately acquainted with all your ways, not just some. I do not pick and choose which of your ways I like and connect only to those. Neither can you choose which of my ways you will connect with and ignore others. I am one and I cannot be divided. He who transgresses even the smallest part of my law transgresses the whole law. That is why, in order for me to be one with you, I had to do something about sin. I lived a human life and kept the whole law for you and I paid the price for every transgression on the cross. The whole of my law and my justice had to be fulfilled for us to be intimately acquainted, as I wished us to be, and though it cost me my life, you are worth it.



Psalm 139, Vs. 4 “Even before there is a word on my tongue, behold, O Lord, You know it all.”

… you know it all!

ME: Everything in all creation that there is to know, or ever will be to know, you know. The most amazing thing to me is that I am part of that. You know all about me, from the hairs on my head to the dirt under my toenail. You know my thoughts, my motives, and my emotional responses. You know it all, and you always have. But you don’t just know about me, you know me, you know my heart. Nothing I think, say or do could ever surprise you, yet you chose me to be your child and you call me the Son of your Heart! I am reminded of Psalm 8:4, “What is man that you take thought of him, or the son of man that you care for him.” But you do, you care for me!

GOD: Dear child, is it really so hard to believe that I love you? You wrestle with it in your mind and you make it this big, impossible thing. Why is it surprising that I would love one whom I created to be loved? Yes, I see and I know your weaknesses and failures, but I knew that before I created you. I know every word you are going to speak before you speak it and every thing you are going to do before you do it. I knew it all before I created anything and I took it all into account. I knew that if I created you in order to love you, that loving you would lead me to the cross. And I decided you were worth it. Why, then, would I let anything you say or do keep me from loving you? That would be negating my own purpose and contradicting my own character. To not love you is the only impossible thing for me.



Psalm 139, Vs. 5 “You have enclosed me behind and before, and laid Your hand upon me.”

You have enclosed me…

ME: Dear Lord, what does it mean to be enclosed by you? Does it mean to be surrounded and cut off from all outside influence? Does it mean to be protected, or perhaps, to be embraced by you? Perhaps it means all of the above. Please open this up to me, Lord. This phrase is unclear to me and, as always, I need your input to understand it.

GOD: Dear Son of My Heart, Yes, all of the above, and more. I have enclosed you within my being, within my heart. I have drawn you into me and have wrapped myself around you. I surround you and I protect you, and sometimes I cut the world off from you when it would harm you or distract you from my way, but I never cut you off from the world. I want you in the world. If I didn’t, I’d have removed you long ago. I will never cut you off from the world because the world needs you. I intend to bless the world through you, and though the world may not receive you as a blessing, nonetheless, you will be a blessing even when you cannot see it yourself. But I often cut the world off from you when it would drag you down or away from me. The world (that is the world system, not my created order) is not intended as a blessing to you nor will I bless you through the world, less you think the blessing came from the world. Your blessing will come from my own hand or through the church, which is my body.

When I enclose you, I am putting myself between you and the world so that whatever comes at you from the world will have to pass through me; and whenever you reach out to the world, it will be through me. In this way, my enclosing of you is both protection to you and an anointing of you as you interact with the world, where I have placed you.

But more than even this, my enclosing of you is an expression of my love for you. There is an intimacy with you that I crave and enclosing you is my way of embracing you. I wrap my arms around you and draw you close to my heart, where we become one: you in me, and I in you. I love it when I so fully enclose you that you can’t tell where I end and you begin; or better still, when the world can’t tell where you end and I begin. I purposefully blur the line between us so that we can be one. When you lose yourself in me, then you will be found in me, and this is what it means to be enclosed by me.

… behind and before …

ME: Lord, once again you amaze me and I am in awe. To be so enclosed by you, to be so used, to be so embraced is to be surrounded by you, both inside and out. This is joy unspeakable! But I sense there is even more here. Not only am I enclosed by you inside and out, but also behind and before.

GOD: Son, do you remember what I showed you once in Isaiah 58:8, “your righteousness will go before you; the glory of the Lord will be your rear guard.” I am your righteousness and I go before you and I am your rear guard. Both your past and your future are in my hands; but notice that this image presumes that you are moving. I enclose you, not to isolate you, but to send you out. I enclose you behind and before on the path as you go. I am moving out ahead of you as your point man, scrutinizing your path, as we’ve talked about before. I am making a way for you, I am leading you in the way, and I am the way. As I enclose you, I also enclose your path so that as you go out, you will be both pursuing me and walking with me in the way.

I also enclose your before, the path you have already walked, redeeming it as you go. I enclose not only the places you have walked with me, but even the places you have walked against me. All the places you have walked, both good and evil, are part of who you are. To enclose you, wholly, I must enclose these as well. All your sins and failures, as well as all other people’s sins that impacted you as you walked your path, I encompassed on the cross. They are now a part of me and they are redeemed in me. The enemy may try to attack you as you move forward with accusations about your past, but I am your rearguard. I have your back. The enemy cannot touch you because I enclose you behind and before.

… and laid your hand upon me.

ME: Lord, I know that you have laid your hand upon me. Sometimes I feel it as I pray or write or minister your love and truth to someone. I come to the end of myself and feel your Holy Spirit take over. I hear your voice and your words seem to flow through me, but I know they are not from me. Sometimes, I can almost feel your hand on my shoulder, guiding me. But other times you seem distant. I can’t feel your presence or hear your voice. Sometimes I begin to listen to the enemy as he tempts me to wonder if you are there at all. But I know what I know, and no lies of the enemy will ever change the reality that you never leave me or forsake me. You are always there.

GOD: Yes, my son, my hand is always upon you, whether you feel it or not. My kingdom is at hand; all you need to do is reach out and touch it. When the workings of your mind blind you and the whispers of the enemy confuse you, all you need to do is reach out, believing, and you will find me there, with my hand on your shoulder, gently guiding you back into my presence. But my touch is light, I never force you. You are always free to ignore my hand and go your own way, but I never leave you. I am there to catch you when you fall and lead you back anytime you choose. I reach out my hand to touch you, to caress the child whom I love, and to claim you as my own. I have laid my hand upon you and I will never let you go.



Psalm 139, Vs. 6 “Such knowledge is too wonderful for me; it is too high, I cannot attain to it.”


... I can not attain to it.

ME: For me to attempt to attain this kind of knowledge would be like trying to jump over the moon. I cannot attain to being so known. I cannot earn it or deserve it or do anything to make you know me and love me like this. It is totally beyond me to attain this level of knowledge about myself, let alone anyone else, especially you. I cannot, by any virtue in me, attain to either being so known or so knowing another. Yet, I am so known and so loved by you; and by your Spirit, I can know and love you in return, at least a little. By your love in me, I can even know and love other people. Apart from you, any real knowing and loving is impossible.

GOD: Dear Son of My Heart, I cannot tell you how wonderful it is to know you, and to see your desire to receive and respond to my love. Although it will never be as high as my love for you, it is immeasurably precious to me. I created you not only to be known by me, but also to know me. You will never know me as fully as I know you, but there are parts of me, aspects of who I am that you alone, in all my created order, will really know. Each child of mine has a special place in my heart only he or she can know. You cannot attain to fullness of knowledge of me, but you can attain to that special knowledge of me that I set apart you for.

As you grow in this special knowledge of me, you will also come to know who you really are, for who you are is defined in your special knowledge of me. As you share that special knowledge of me, you will help others come to know me and you will thus be known by them. Also, as you seek to know others, you will grow in your knowledge of me, for you will be gaining glimpses of those parts of my heart that have been revealed only to them. You will have all eternity to grow in your knowledge of me and to share that knowledge with your brothers and sisters. As all my children come to know those parts of my heart reserved for each of them, and as they learn to share that knowledge and love with each other, then I will be fully known, but that will take eternity.




The preceding were excerpts from the first 6 verses of Mediations on Psalm 139 by Van Burbach. For the complete meditations on the entire psalm, please contact the author.

Scripture taken from the NEW AMERICAN STANDARD BIBLE®, Copyright © 1960,1962,1963,1968,1971,1972,1973,1975,1977, 1995 by The Lockman Foundation.

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