Christian Living

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Larry Lilly's Letter Monday June 10, 2007

The May 31st Pensacola Journal carried an interesting article by Anne Thrower on the subject of domestic abuse and how men, decent men can and should stand against this bully practice in our society.

The Chief of Police at Pensacola Junior College, Nancy Newland was adamant that the male and female officers in her department attend a lecture on domestic violence presented by Jackson Katz. Her reasons for this are given in the article but in summation Chief Newland said:

"More men, particularly men in leadership roles need to get involved in the issue of domestic violence, or gender violence as he prefers to call it. Men can be heard in a way women can’t be heard and focus should be on prevention, not risk reduction. But it's an uphill fight in the American culture where men are under intense pressure to remain silent when other men demean and joke about women. If you don't challenge them, your silence is a form of consent. It's not enough to feel it in your heart."

I found it interesting that the seminar deals with "demeaning" in the same category as physical abuse. In some cases the "put down" abuse has more lasting negative results than the physical.

The stats on abuse are staggering; especially when you factor that some 60 to 80 million Americans claim to be Christians. In the Florida counties of Escambia and Santa Rosa during the year 2005 more than 4,000 cases of domestic violence were reported. On the national level experts believe only about 10 percent of domestic violence incidents are reported.

In the years I have served as a Pastor I have been appalled at the number of women who are abused verbally and physically by Christian men. I remarked one time to man that I was thinking about starting a "Beat Your Wife For Jesus" club, as there seemed to be too many men who were practicing abuse against the wife. I later discovered that he could have been the president of the club.

To stand against evil is one of the requirements given to Christians by the Lord and to fail in doing so in the area of domestic abuse is a "cop out" of major implications. Prior to my conversion to Christ at age 20, I was witness to domestic violence on a near daily basis and this violence was perpetrated on wives, children and even the puppies. I watched a drunken "man" beat a puppy to death and tell his wife, "You ….. if you don't straighten up, your gonna git the same." I was around 10. In my thirties I intervened forcefully as a rather large man, a Sunday School teacher, lifted his tiny wife off the ground and slammed her onto the hood of the family car. His very good reason for doing this was as he said, "She made me mad." Good reason, I'm certain Jesus accepts such spoiled brat reasons.

Is the mistreating of widows by professing Christian leaders placed in the category of domestic violence? Probably not, as it, in my opinion, comes under a much stronger biblical proscription. I take the liberty of applying the domestic violence quote to this form of violence and hope that you will lend your voice in rebuking this outrageous behavior carried out in the name of Christ.

"If you don't challenge them, your silence is a form of consent. It's not enough to feel it in your heart."

Larry Lilly Copyright © 2007 Use with credit.

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