Devotionals

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I Will Wait Upon the Lord

As I prepare myself for another visit today with the birth-father of my foster-to-adopt son, I realize that God continues to require me to patiently wait with a heart of love and compassion.

My foster-son has been in our home for nine months now, and we need for his birth-father to sign surrender papers for us to proceed with his adoption. The waiting, and praying, require an abundance of patience on my part. Webster’s dictionary describes patience as:

1. the quality of being patient, as the bearing of provocation, annoyance, misfortune, or pain, without complaint, loss of temper, irritation, or the like.
2. an ability or willingness to suppress restlessness or annoyance when confronted with delay: to have patience with a slow learner.
3. quiet, steady perseverance; even-tempered care; diligence: to work with patience.

I, as a Christian, am called to display the fruits of the spirit; “love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control” [Galatians 5: 22 – 23] in my dealings with this man.

I am finding that as time passes, it is becoming more difficult to display love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. I, like most humans, want what I want, and I want it now. I am told in Colossians 3:12 – 13; that I am to “clothe myself with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.” I am to “bear with other[s] and forgive whatever grievances I may have against [any] one. [I am to] forgive as the Lord forgave [me].”

My sisters, I tell you that I find these verses to be hard teaching when I try to apply them to my current situation. I know the conditions that my foster-son faced prior to joining my family. I do not want him to be subjected to those conditions again. I struggle with the willingness to suppress annoyance when confronted with delay. I want to be angry and I struggle to control my temper. I ask myself how I can forgive the pain that was inflicted upon my foster-son; and I ask how I may prevent him from suffering the infliction of pain in the future.

Then, the Holy Spirit speaks to me. He calls me to realize, that I am human and I am a Mother. It is not within my natural strength or ability to be able to behave as Christ instructed in this situation. In my own power and strength I am unable to get past the less than loving emotions that I have for this man who stands in the way of making my dream to adopt my foster-son complete. However, praise God, with the strength of the Holy Spirit who lives within me I can “live a life worthy of the Lord and may please him in every way: bearing fruit in every good work, growing in the knowledge of God.” [Colossians 1:10] And I can be “strengthened with all power according to his glorious might so that [I] may have great endurance and patience, and joyfully give thanks to the Father.” [Colossians 1: 11-12] The Holy Spirit can give me the quiet, steady perseverance and even-tempered care to continue with diligence while providing love and care to my foster-son as I wait upon the Lord.

My greatest desire in life is to serve the Lord with all of my heart and soul. I want to live up to the calling that God has placed upon my heart! I want to help other women learn to walk closely with Jesus, no matter what circumstances they have in their lives. Because of this desire, and in spite of my human weakness, I have realized that with God all things are possible. I have realized that even if God works in this situation, as I desire, and I am allowed to adopt my foster-son; this child is not mine. Nor is he his birth-father’s child. My foster-son, like all children, belongs to God; he is God’s child. I have prayed over this child and have returned him to the Lord.

Now, I can truly say “I will wait patiently upon the Lord. His timing and will are perfect. He knows what is best for my child, and He will work everything out to His glory.”

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