Humor

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Some people say blue is just a color. I say flabluey to them. Where do these people get off trying to tell me how I should feel? The gall of some people simply amazes me; however, I am too blue to chase them down some alley today. But I will tell you, it makes me red-faced mad to hear them talk this way.

If I want to be “blue,” I have the right to be “blue.” Moreover, it is my personal opinion that people should respect my blueness. After all, I respect their yellowness.

It all began this past Monday when a leading news report indicated that Jan. 22 was the bluest day of the year. The report went on to say that, most people find themselves rather down and listless on this day of the year. They don’t know if it is the weather causing this or perhaps, as one suggested, the Christmas bills are finally coming in around that time of the month.

Sometimes a green Christmas can put you so much in the red that you end up being blue by the end of January.

Whatever the cause, the facts suggest a reality that should no longer be ignored by the general population. I say it is about time somebody recognized this.

I’m all for setting aside Jan. 22 as a holiday celebrating being blue. After all, who can work when down in the dumps, unless you work for sanitation company?

We have holidays for just about every other thing in this country. Just when you think you have a long stretch of weeks in a row without any kind of interference, up comes some holiday somebody with a work-challenged brain invented to have a day off, with pay.

I would like to know where they get all of these holidays from in the first place. It is getting so that you cannot get anything done if it calls for two solid weeks of work.

Within those two weeks, you are sure to have some kind of holiday shutting everything down and hindering any kind of business. Usually, the businesses that are closed that day are the very ones you need to finish your work that day.

This in and of itself creates a very deep blue muse on my part. It would be good if we could collect a whole year’s worth of being blue and put it all in one day. Then everybody could be blue the same day; all business would stop, everything would come to a complete halt and we all could celebrate being blue and get it over with for the year and get back to a productive life making greenbacks.

I do not think there is anything wrong with being blue. Most people are in complete denial of their blueness, which I think only exasperates the problem. No amount of yellow smiley faces can change the simple fact that you are blue.

If you are blue, you are blue and there is no way to get around it. Being blue is not all that bad, unless you are a Smurf. Then you might need some extensive psychological help. Not that I have anything against Smurfs, but being blue all the time just is not healthy.

If we could have a holiday set aside to celebrate being blue it might cheer up some of us who are blue. We could have blue parties to celebrate the Royal Fellowship of Blueness.

We could even develop a Hallmark card category that would generate millions of dollars per year. I’m sure we can find some way to turn blue into green. After all, that is the American way.

Books could be written about the psychological importance of blueness. Dr. Phil could spend a whole week talking about the importance of blueness and the dangers of denial. “Owning up to your blueness,” he could say, “will be a red-letter day for you.” People will then begin coming out of their blue closet into the bright sunshine.

Experts could spring up to tell us how to maximize our blueness on Blue-Day. That would be most helpful than celebrating Blue-Day. And if we cannot eliminate our blue is perhaps we can change it to a very deep purple.

When I finally finished my brown bag study, I thought I might see what the Bible had to say about this subject. And of course, as always, the Bible came through for me.

Sometimes people have the idea that life should be all one happy, glorious experience without any trials or tribulations. You only have to be conscious one day to realize this is not the way life is, actually. If anybody knew days that were blue, it was the Lord Jesus Christ during his days on earth. He knew troubled times would come for us all and so his words of encouragement mean so very much to me.

“Behold, the hour cometh, yea, is now come, that ye shall be scattered, every man to his own, and shall leave me alone: and yet I am not alone, because the Father is with me. These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world.” (John 16:32-33 KJV.)

The “I have” of Jesus makes all the difference in my world. The only cure for being blue, in my opinion, is meditating upon the golden promises our Lord gave to us.

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