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The Home for Christian Writers! Matthew 6:33

Communication

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Be Careful What You Say

by Elizabeth Hale
10/26/06
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"Let no corrupt word proceed out of your mouth, but what is good for necessary edification, that it may impart grace to the hearers. Let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from you, with all malice. And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you."(Ephesians 4:29,31-32, NKJV)

"Guard what was committed to your trust, avoiding the profane and idle babblings and contradictions of what is falsely called knowledge--by professing it some have strayed concerning the faith. Grace be with you. Amen." (1 Timothy 6:20-21, NKJV)

This is a crazy world we live in. Most of the time, we aren't sure where to turn. We are unable to trust in the people around us, and for good reasons.

You've been carrying a heavy load. You need to share it with someone. You've already shared it with God, yet you feel compelled to talk it over with a trusted friend. So you spill the beans, seeking help. Within a week, it seems like everyone you know thinks they know what's going on with you. Things have morphed into something that doesn't have anything to do with what is really going on, but the damage is done. Now, not only do you have to contend with the original problem--you also have to fend off the misconceptions that have arisen too! It all just leaves you feeling more alone than you did before. Don't do this to people! God says it is evil; therefore, it is. And if someone does this to you, they are not your friend. Your friends would never do this to you. Your true friends defend you and speak the truth about you, just as you do for them. This is why you call each other friend. A false friend is soon found out. When you see one of them heading your way, run!

I think I've always had some issues with trusting other people. I'm too chicken to be totally up front with most people. I may have good reasons for this, but still, I like to think that when I tell someone close to me something in confidence, that's where it will stay. I've been very disappointed in this area, but I also have had my faith in basic humanity restored too. Or should I say, I haven't heard otherwise yet, so I trust that my confidences were kept. We need to be able to trust each other. We need to refrain from breaking another's trust and confidence in us. If you are just dying to tell something, then go into your bedroom or bathroom and look into your mirror, and have at it. Respect the fact that someone has seen you as a confidante, and keep that silly tongue from wagging. We people are talkers, no doubt about it. In most conversations, other people get brought up. I'm not saying you can't mention anyone--I'm saying that if what you are saying is malicious, it's wrong. If you are speaking truth, expressing concern, brainstorming ways to help, or just trying to figure out what's going on so you can help, that's not wrong. That's called 'necessary edification'. If you just need to blow off steam for some reason, then go ahead but make sure you're doing it with someone you can trust not to share your little meltdown with other people. The tiniest words can sometimes cause the greatest hurt and cause a lot of trouble!

Out of our mouths proceed all kinds of evil. If you can control the things you say, the things you allow to spill out of your mouth, then you are a powerful and blessed person. The Word tells us that we will be held accountable for every idle word we allow to pass our lips. It also tells us that if we guard our mouths and tongues we keep our souls from troubles.

Reread the verses at the beginning. These verses
should steer you every day of your life.

Don't gossip. Don't talk bad about people just because they irritated you somehow. Speak the truth in kindness, with love guiding the words.

"Avoid foolish disputes, genealogies, contentions, and strivings about the law; for they are unprofitable and useless."(Titus 3:9,NKJV)

Most important of all, remember these words in all your interactions with others--"Who, when He was reviled, did not revile in return; when He suffered, He did not threaten, but committed Himself to Him who judges righteously." (1 Peter 2:23, NKJV)

Life is hard. Don't make it harder for yourself or anyone else by saying things you shouldn't.
Keep your mouth under lockdown. Commit yourself, your life, your work, and your words to God and you cannot fail.

"He who would love life and see good days, let him refrain his tongue from evil, and his lips from speaking deceit." (1 Peter 3:10, NKJV)



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Jounda LaMance
29 Oct 2006
GReat article! Full of truth! I had to laugh as I was reading this - cause how many times have you heard this phrase: "now the only reason I am telling you this is so you will help me pray." Yah right! 9 times out of 10 it is GOSSIP! As Christians we have done a very poor job of loving - the sinners and each other! I am reminded of James 5:16 Confess your trespasses to one another, and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The effective, fervent prayer of a righteous man avails much. (NKJV) Yet, as a body it is difficult to do this because we like to talk! Lord help us! Thank you for writing this article! YSICJ, Jounda
Don Beers
28 Oct 2006
Well written, I think. Seems there is within you a writer just dying to "get out". This topic, although it it always timely and an oft reminder we do well to heed; I can't help but feel that, from your writing style and ability that there is "in there" an author that has much to say. It's not that this topic is generic, it's not, it's just that there seems to be a creative side of you that is subdued! This article "flowed" easily, carrying the reader from point "A" to point "B" effortlessly; you've got that part down. You made the point graciously; there was no condemnation, only understanding. Try this; let the flowers of your heart and words grow in the garden of your work and allow us to enjoy the garden of the Lord in YOU!
Thomas Kittrell
26 Oct 2006
Out of our mouths proceed all kinds of evil. If you can control the things you say, the things you allow to spill out of your mouth, then you are a powerful and blessed person.
Amen!

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