Christian Living

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Before I do what it is you have asked of me, Lord, I need a guarantee. Honestly? I have a few guarantees I need to see before I’ll move on. A few, understandable conditions, I suppose one could call them. After all I’ve been through, well, you know my heart, I’m sure you understand.

First of all, your command to love? I’ll do that, just as soon as I am assured that they will love me too. I want to be loved as much as the other person, but so far they’ve shown me anything but love. You know as well as I do that I loved them in the beginning, but they kept doing things to hurt me and it got harder and harder to love them.

Next, your words say that I am to forgive them. Okay, that’s not a problem. First of all, I would just need to know that they will admit they have done me wrong. You know the whole confession thing and all. If they will at least acknowledge the wrong they’ve committed, then at least I would have hope that they would never do those things to me ever again. Once they’ve done that, then the relationship will most certainly grow from there.

Now, about being merciful, as you say, Lord. Well, I can do that too. As soon as they change, then I will grant mercy, I will not withhold any good thing from them. Mercy, the not giving them what they do deserve? I’ll do that as soon as they repent.

Grace? Of course, giving them what they don’t deserve. That’s easy. As soon as they apologize. After all, I don’t want to enable them. I promise to give them tough love until then, that way maybe they will realize that all they do is hurt me.

Keep no record of wrongs? I know, I know, I do have a small list, but, you know my heart, you know the things they’ve done to me.

Love covers a multitude of sins? Define “multitude” for me. To me, multitude is, well, it’s enough.

Seven times seventy? I’m not sure, but I think they passed that a long time ago. I’m sure of it. They have most certainly gone beyond what your word requires of me and my having to forgive them. I am sure you and I would agree on that.


Bless them that curse you? Well, I am. I’m talking to you about them, aren’t I? I want what’s best for them and since I’ve been with them for so long there is no one that knows them as well as I do, yeah, I am sure I know what’s best for them.

Pray for them that despitefully use you? That’s what I’m doing right now. I’m telling you what they’ve done to me. You know my heart, Lord.

If your enemy is hungry, feed him. I used to, but, they didn’t change. It’s not very loving to keep enabling them the way I have been.

By the way, thank you that you have chosen me to be the vessel you would use to bring life to them. It’s exciting to be used by you in the life of one of your children, it’s like a dream come true.

Love believes all things. I believe they need to change, yes, I can agree to that.
Love hopes all things. I believe that as soon as they stop hurting me that real change has come, yes, I can agree to that too.
Love is patient. I am being patient. I’m patiently waiting for you.
Love is kind. Well, no one that I know would say I’ve been anything but nice to them. What do you mean when you say “kind”? I’ve been a decent person to them, even after all they’ve done to me. I’ve said some things I probably shouldn’t have, but, it comforts me to know that you’ve forgiven me.

God is merciful to the unthankful and the unholy. Well, that’s easy for you to do, you’re God. Before I forget, thank you for giving me your Spirit to enable me to understand your grace, mercy, forgiveness and love. It means so much to me!

“Father, forgive them, they know not what they do.” Man, isn’t that the truth? This guy is so blind it’s almost ridiculous. Clueless, he really doesn’t know what life is all about, does he? I can sure agree with you on that one.
Well, Lord, that’s my prayer, my petition, my request. By the way, not my will, but yours be done. In Jesus name, amen.

(I would elaborate, but, really, which of us hasn’t prayed like this. Oh, maybe not with spoken words, but in a life lived. Which one of us isn’t living like this right now? I believe it speaks for itself. Even though I wrote it, I’m crushed by it. I hate the truth of it, but I love the truth of it. Like Daniel, the words of the scroll were sweet to his lips but bitterness to his belly. It tastes good until it gets into the deepest part of your being.)

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