Holidays

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Gratitude and Thanksgiving

You might think that these two words have the same meaning. Certainly, they are intimately related. However, there is at least one major distinction. Quite simply, “Gratitude” is a noun, a thing, a feeling. “Thanksgiving” is a verb, an action, a way in which we express our gratitude. Before you can truly give thanks, you must first experience the feeling of thankfulness. And what a wonderful feeling it is!

I have found gratitude to be one of the most powerful feelings; powerful in its ability to transform my thinking, to dramatically change my experience of an event or interaction, and to heal deep wounds and nearly severed relationships. Gratitude can eliminate stress more quickly than any technique I know.

So, let’s try something fun. Let’s take a minute to just experience the warm, wonderful feeling of gratitude. You will find that this exercise can be practiced at any moment throughout the day. My personal goal is to maintain this feeling of gratitude all day long. Of course, I have a long way to go to reach that goal, but I am much happier, less affected by stressful events, and I have richer and more loving relationships than ever before. Are you ready? Here’s an exercise from my book, “The Ultimate Wish Book for Grown-ups”, modified slightly so we can practice together:

Begin by closing your eyes and concentrate on the physical sensation of your breath, going in and out. Relax your mind, bringing all of your awareness to your breath. What does it feel like? Is it tight and hard to breathe? Does it feel open and relaxed? Don’t try to change it, just observe.

Now, rest you mind on someone or something for which you are grateful and notice how the sensations in your body change. As I practice with you, I feel gentle warmth spreading from the very center of my chest, washing effortlessly over my whole body. My face feels lighter and less strained; my breathing becomes deeper and more relaxed. The longer I stay here, with my attention on the feeling of gratitude, my mind becomes less cluttered and infinitely more open.

This is relatively easy to practice when you are alone, without distractions and stress. But the greatest benefits can be felt when you practice it in the midst of chaos and antagonism. Give it a try! Feel gratitude even in the face of extreme adversity. This doesn’t mean being grateful for the person or events that are causing your distress. Simply feel the physical sensations of gratitude as you move through these struggles. Gratitude will buffer you from hostility, confusion, and fear. You will be astounded by the many ways that this simple exercise heals your heart and soul and transforms your life.

As we sit down this Thanksgiving Day, let us give thanks for the support we give each other, sharing this community of friends. Let’s remember to really feel our thanks before we speak them. And let us continue to live Thanksgiving throughout the whole year through the experience of gratitude. Happy Thanksgiving!

© 2005 Melanie Calitri Holden
Melanie is the author of The Ultimate Wish Book for Grown-ups: How to Use the Magic of Santa to Create Your Dreams (www.UltimateWishBook.com) and teaches workshops to help adults reconnect with the spirit of their youth for a healthier and happier life. You can write to Melanie at [email protected] .

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