Family

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Never in a million years would I have thought that something as simple to me as writing a song could affect me so greatly. It was not one of those bright and shining moments we songwriters wait our whole lives for. No, it was more like a dim and glowing one, but one of those moments nonetheless. These three people with whom I have spent my life, were my life. The thought certainly had been running around this 42 year-old brain more than once over the past 20 years. Why did I wait this long to tell them (and others) just how much they meant to me? Why didn't this come out years ago? Why...oh, stop it, you're trying to micro analyze everything again. Just go with it for crying out loud.

It started as a simple melody last night. I wanted to have the song be about them, and each of the three verses one they could own. Wife, Son, Daughter. They came into my life in that order, I would write about them in the same way. That morning, I awoke and looked over at the lady that had put up with me for almost 20 years. God, how I loved her.

It was a movie moment. The sunlight was peeking in ever so slightly through the bedroom window. The drapes were not quite wide enough to block it all out. Some of this light spilled over on the side of her familiar face and lit it up like one of those 1940’s films where the camera zooms in on the heroine; a soft lens captures the even softer cheeks and hair.

The first verse was born and flowed out so perfectly, marrying itself with last night's melody:

"I opened up my eyes today for the first time
and I saw a ray of sun on her face.
My wife of almost twenty years,
I thanked the Lord above who hears each grateful word I say."

There. That was what I was trying to say and didn't know it. I wanted God to know I was thankful for every one of them. These three humans. Three out of six billion. He had entrusted me to care just for them. I was grateful. Grateful to you, God. Thank you.

"...just how a blessing like this comes my way,
I'll never know, but while it's called, 'Today'"

This lyric would be a bridge that would connect all three verses with the chorus. After all, that was the real message I was trying to get across. Yes, I love my family (who doesn't), but I wanted them and everyone else to know that I considered them a true gift from the God I had put my faith in all these years. Plus, I was clueless as to what I had done to deserve this blessing.




My son is now almost 19. He's next in line for a verse. I got out of bed and walked into the hall as I do every morning. His door is always shut. Not today (this is songwriting stuff you know, those days when the cosmic lines up with the menial and world-shattering things like this happen). His door was ajar and I peeked in on his sleeping frame, remembering when that frame could have easily cradled itself between my elbow and wrist with room to spare.


“I opened up my eyes today for the first time
and I saw him laying there in his room.
The son who is my strong right hand is now much less a boy than man,
and he’ll be leaving soon.”

Ouch. Didn’t like that thought. The Cat’s in the Cradle and the Silver Spoon…didn’t Harry Chapin have a son like mine? Second verse is done.

The third wasn’t difficult (not that the other two were). As I passed my son’s lair, the next room I peeked into was the one where only a short time ago my daughter had been sitting on the floor combing her doll’s hair, singing the theme song to Barney the Dinosaur. Now only a few breaths later, there were all these long pants hanging in her closet. Where’d all those big shoes come from and who put that full size bed in there when I wasn’t looking?

The third and final verse sprang to mind like a Fourth of July firework that your eyes follow up into the air until it explodes into a million sparks and lights up your face.

“I opened up my eyes today for the first time
and I heard her say, ‘Daddy I love you’.
The little girl who holds my heart in her hand
is such a part of days that are so few”

"...just how a blessing like this comes my way, I'll never know, but while it's called, 'Today'…."

Then the chorus came in like a flood:

“I’ll thank you, Almighty, Creator of Life,
Thank you for sharing your loved ones,
Surrounding me with my children, and wife of my youth,
Lord, I am grateful to you.”

The best song I’ve ever written…so far. Lord, I am grateful to you.

A fitting title. Tears. Swelling heart. Humble that I’m alive. “Grateful to You”.

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