Prayers

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Lord, I need more of You...that is all. It is 2:30 a.m., I am wide awake and I simply NEED YOU! NOW!

When all is said and done to adjust circumstances - when I have taken the pills and refinanced the house and worked too hard and cried in my pillow and griped to my friends and read all the right books and juggled every ounce of energy - what is left is surrender. And I must choose that - You will not force it. I have so often fought valiantly for what seemed right in my own mind and inadvertently ended up supporting what was, at best, fleeting.

It seems there are two prayers, Lord, that You long to hear. The first is your powerful name - "JESUS!" - and the second is our submitted response to that name - "YES, LORD!"

Give me eyes to see You at work in my life, ears to hear your Spirit's voice in my heart, and the desire to obey and serve You as I am led. Hang the circumstances! I simply long for more of You, Lord. Hear this cry of my heart. Come, be my Shepherd, restore my soul, lead me to develop convictions about whatever is everlasting and then act on them.

Already I feel the tug on my heart and hear your whisper. "Relationships. Nothing else will last. Invest yourself in people."

Ohhhhhhhhh, I'm not to focus so much on the issues - the illness or the emotional pain or the needs or the financial problems confronting the people I love - that I exclude THE PEOPLE THEMSELVES.

"JESUS!"

Yes, I hear you calling.

"JESUS!"

You know I hear; I will help you follow your heart. It has already spoken!

"YES, LORD!"

My personal ministry is to be heart-to-heart, rather than head-to-head. I've known this for some time, but I see it more clearly, now.

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Hours later, a new day has begun. I find myself staring groggily at a single fisherman out on the still, gray lake. A lonely soul, lost in solitary pursuit. Is this not the life condition? Without God? Isn't our goal to come alongside and share the moment, not necessarily the latest tricks and lures/gizmos and techniques? See the analogy?

I wonder about my unsaved sister, age 69. Where IS her heart? She has hidden and protected it so well that I can no longer even find it. So I end up addressing issues and concerns and petty situations rather than the Real Person. And yet, with God's help, I wonder if her heart can be exposed; if we can still relate somehow on this level. This must be my new prayer for that relationship.

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