Humor

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Elaine sat on the porch sipping her warm cup of comfort. The aroma filled her nostrils and calmed her heart. If their marriage had meant anything he would know where to find her. All he had to do was read her mind; or find the brochure she left on the dresser.

She rocked back and forth on the creaky front porch, listening to the birds having their conversations over morning birdseed and watched them bathing shamelessly in the water trough by the front steps.

The dust began to blow down the road, and the cloud got higher and higher. A brown four door duelly emerged from the dust and settled itself with a jerking motion directly in front of the porch. She recognized the truck they bought on their 5th wedding anniversary.

Elaine quickly grabbed an old newspaper off the floor and began to read it. Jim walked upon the porch and grinned.

“How can you grin after what you did?” she questioned his humor.

“I’m just happy to see you,” he reported, “that, and its funny to see you reading a newspaper from last year.”

“I like old news, its nostalgic, you know, like old relationships?” Elaine replied.

“I like them too,” Jim told her. “That’s why I’m here. You’ve made a big mistake.”

Elaine rolled her eyes in his direction. “I’ve made a big mistake? No way buster brown, you’re the mistake maker here. I know what I found, I know where it was, and I know what it said.”

“Okay,” Jim replied. “Let’s talk about what you think you found. You found a locket right?

“Uh. Huh.” Elaine nodded.

“And you read what it said?” Jim questioned her.

“The inscription burned right through my heart,” she stated, “Dorothy, your love guides my way safely home.”

“And you found it in our bed?”

“That’s right charley cheater.”

“Okay, now it’s my turn. Fair enough?” he asked.

“You better make it quick and you better make it good.”

“The locket belonged to my mother. It was given to her by my father when he returned home from the Vietnam War.” Jim told her. “I was giving it to you for our anniversary. It must have fallen out of my shirt pocket and into the bed.”

“Nice try, but I’m no dummy. Your mother’s name was Regina.”

“You’re right,” he said. “But her nickname was Dorothy, because she was the biggest Wizard of Oz fan ever. Watched the movie at least 102 times that I know of.”

Elaine sat on the porch dumfounded. She had jumped to conclusions again. Why did he always end up being right?

“I wanted you to have the locket,” he grabbed her gingerly by the hand and looked deep into her eyes, “ because your love helps me find my way home.”

“Okay,” she peered up at him. “I’ll forgive you. But only because you bought and actually wore those silly pointy cowboy boots.”

“Thank you,” he chuckled. “I’m glad you like them.”

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