Grief

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I heard a sermon based on a verse from on Isaiah on the subject of " when passing through the valley of Baca (sorrow) dig a well.

Once I passed through that valley - and while I didn't know it at the time - I dug a well. Today I am drinking from that well as I face a different valley of sorrow.

My time of sorrow was when my sister died - unexpectedly - prematurely (she was barely 33) and without apparent cause. We guess it was a heart attack.

The well I dug was really just "digging into God's word" and learning to believe His promises. I learned that God was with me because somehow He gave me the strength to read His word. Somehow He gave me strength to get up every morning and go through the day. He gave me strength to live each day. He gave me strength to begin to look toward the future. The first thing He showed me when I was looking toward the future was our eternal future. I "saw" heaven. I saw a very real place filled with very real people doing very real and wonderful things. I saw peace and joy. I saw love and excitement. I saw beauty without ugliness, pure love without any animosity. It was wonderful.

Then from that vantage point I began to consider the immediate future and try to live each day as it came. Gradually it became more normal. There will always be an empty place in my life here on this earth because my sister's existence here is missed. Nothing could fill her place. But I know she is in heaven doing just fine. The Bible tells us eye has not seen nor ear heard nor has it entered into the heart of man what God has for those who love Him. So - I miss her - but I am not without hope. On the firm foundation of God's promise - I will see her again and there will be no parting anymore. All this was from digging through the wonderful written message God gave us. The Bible became more real to me than ever before. It is a well of comfort and joy beyond anything we can imagine. Really the well is already dug. We just have to dig through the wisdom to find what we need at the moment.

Now my father I law is facing terminal cancer. He is the earthly patriarch of my husband's family. He is loved deeply. His illness is hurtful to everyone because we don't want to see him suffer and grow weaker. We don’t' want him to leave this earth. We want all of us to abide in good health until the return of the Lord. But in leaving us here - we KNOW he is going to the same place in which my sister now resides. I have already come to terms with how wonderful that place will be. My real sorrow is for the family who will be left without him. Without his corny jokes and his onery way. Without his steady faithfulness in the daily things of life. For his wife of 64 years who will be left alone and lost without him. But I have hope for the future. That future is more real than the here and now. The very thought of the reunion in heaven becomes more and more precious with the passing of each loved one. But it becomes more real each time. Sometimes I begin to wonder how thin the veil between heaven and earth really may be.

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