Humor

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TOP TEN PROVERBS THAT DIDN’T QUITE MAKE IT

#10 Whip your neighbor with the Scourge of Kindness, club your friends with the Cudgel of Brotherhood, beat your relatives with the Stick of Goodness, and flog the stranger in your house with the Cord of Hospitality.

#9 Like the last disintegrating mass of disgusting loathsome compost that ever stunk up the back corner of a garden – that’s what bad things are like

#8 Corruption and politics are like oil and water; they can never mix.

#7 Be not advised to make the elephant for a household pet; they break much furniture and the litter box is enormous

#6 The Storm of Destiny may toss you mercilessly and make you hurl your guts out over the Rail of Despondency.

#5 If you have to choose between being slowly eaten by ants in the desert or riches, choose riches

#4 A nosey neighbor is like setting fire to your hair – well, not in any direct metaphorical sense, but both are not good.

#3 Listen to the counsel of the merchant and peddler of used goods; be assured they have your best interest at heart.

#2 Bad stuff happens

And the #1 Proverb That Didn’t Quite Make It:


#1 Give your wife the gift of a Proverb instead of gem or jewel; for they are most highly prized above all else, and you will shine in her eyes as a wise and generous husband.

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