Family

WHAT CHILDREN HATE part one

by Bolaji O.Timothy
02/10/05
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Extract from 30 relevant things children hate.

"And you fathers do not provoke you children to wrath but bring them up in the training and admonition of the God Ephesian 6;3 Lo, children are an heritage of the LORD: and the fruit of the womb is his reward. As arrows are in the hand of a mighty man; so are children of the youth. Psalm 127:3-4 Whatever we bread our children with determines what their breeds will be. Output behaviour, attitude to life, reaction and action is a function of inputs on children.

Whatever definition we may give to these treasures: they are God's heritage! Children to some parents, teachers and guardians may be those little ignorant and fragile creatures that need to be angrily smacked for doing wrong. -"they must be corrected and punished" some said. Agreed, But abuse does not mean correction! At the moment, as parent and guardian , We do not owe them any explanation for decision taken about them, they have to and truly they have to, since we feed, clothe, pay their schools' bill and possibly make other provisions and even if we do not meet all these, they have to obey us Ephesians 6:1-2! But the fact remains, that some of them will stand in future, to question our various decisions or attest them, applaud, or apply them in their own homes. Their times are in our custody to direct; majorities of which are wasted by the ungodly lifestyle of some parents, guardians and teachers!How these little children matter and will affect the way we treat them. We need to, like Christ, sincerely we need to.

But when Jesus saw it, he was much displeased, and said unto them, suffer the little children to come unto me, and forbid them not: for of such is the kingdom of God. Mark 10:14

According to J. D. Salinger; A child is a guest in the house, to be loved and respected,ever possessed, since he belongs to God.
We should understand that, parent, teachers, guardian and the church make lots of impact and inputs into the lives of little kids (children) which outputs automatically will come forth as they grow. They will come forth on the screen of their lives. Studies have shown that parent who maltreat their children were probably maltreated by their own parents, guardians and teachers. These Children have lots of potential, in fact, they are boundless of potentials. But their personalities, prominence and proficiency in the field of exploit in life will be affected for a while or permanently. by their background and how they were treated. The attitude of parents, teachers, guardian and government and church determine how they will respond and explore various resources of time, material resources, and knowledge, and how they will handle relationship with God and men.

You fathers, do not provoke your children to wrath but bring them u in the training and admonition of the God Eph 6;3

What do children hate if their parents do?
What do children hate if their teachers do?
What do children hate if there nation or government do?
What do children hate if adult do?
What do children hate if their churches do?
Parent, teachers, guardians and church have the power to provoke children to react and respond to their societies. If these provocations are inspirational, long standing problems in the societies and church will witness solutions. But if these ones attitude are not inspirational, the world and the church will witness yet another tragedy, many problems will crop up from these ill treatment that children may be receiving at the moment in many parts of the world. Children react to things differently and likewise adult. Ill situation and treatment may inspire one, and to another discouragement. These are what children hate. They are basically considered based on subsequent effect on their personality, relationship with God and fellow men. It will affect them in the discovery and use of their gifts, talents and abilities. These things they hate which are in consideration in this work will affect the type of leadership skill they will develop. They will affect the habits and attitude they develop. Habits of children or adult were as a result of something they hate or love in the parent, teachers, society or church

According to David farrigton-Problem children tend to grow up into problem adults and problem adults tend to produce more problem children.

Indeed children needs to learn a lot as parent and teachers did. They will need to learn discipline so that latter in life they will know how to organize their grace, gift and goods. They will need to learn how to read and write so as to meet the educational challenges and career development. They will need endurance and perseverance for there are many things, in life that will require such suggestions. They will need to develop skill, for no one, I mean no one is paid based on the undeveloped gift, talent, abilities and unharnessed potential Many of these things are really not voiced out by many, but at one time or the other I have heard them acted out or regretted over.. They are compiled from experiences of many people: young and older friends, from many situations, circumstances and events. They have been tested and applicable to any culture and religion. These are what they hate and will affect many homes, nations, and children. We may have to appreciate the poem of Dorothy Law Noite at this point: Children lives what they learnt I will not talk about schools, food and individual differences that children dislike. But on issues that universally cut across races, tribes and languages, cultures, religion, education, civic laws and prospective future under any climate or cloud. These are some of their protests:

Children hate impression and expression of hatred. The best gift that can be given to children in any country, by any parent, guardian, teacher and the church is Love. Food, shelter, cloth and education are not the basic need of children. Children's basic need by all is love. The expression of hatred toward a child either indirectly or directly can destroy the purpose of education, and other needs supplied in the home. Love is basic and provides the assurance to handle situation in life. It is a good a condition for the children to use all they have: God given intellect and all they have learned and are learning in the school. We do not need wealth to provide this. As expensive as love is in the societies of the world, it is cheap to show. What they need is not you money and material first, it is love with this they can find means to success. if you have provided the platform of love, It easier to solve the problem of poverty when there is real love within the home. It requires consistent effort to implement the wonder, potency and potential of Love in the home. May we find the grace for this always.

Children hate comparison with others children. It is very important to know that abilities differ. There is nothing that hardens the heart of children than this attitude. Whenever they see that they are never like the standard parent or guardian or teachers set before them, you are brooding hatred in them, and you may be raising criminals. This may hinder such children to discover who and what they are. This remove freedom of thought and use of initiative. Once they sight the child or children that are set up as standards, there is a sense of hatred and they may, from there, develop hatred for you and those standards. Inferiority complex is common with such children that had to live in this kind of situation. I lost a very good friend of mine through suicide to this kind of treatment when I was seventeen years old .

Children hate their parents live apart. These wonderful potential (children) cannot determine many things before birth and after birth. But really, they hate their parent living separately. Although, with the situation in the world, single parenting demographic situation is on the increase, it is unfortunate. but in reality, no child loves this. If these may continue, it is dependent on the wisdom of the single parent. As much as possible, this had to be dealt with on time and with great understanding on the part of their parent. As musch as possible, if it can be prevent , Great! Children do not parents give them this kind of story. - Some children do not like that kind of life. Living separately from their parent. Either in the orphanage houses or any loss of any of the parent, children generally hate it. It is very important that Guardians recognize this; they need to be loved. For it is only love that fill these gaps.

Children hate neglect. Neglect is recognized as child abuse. This affect physically and emotionally and it is common in this generation. Neglect takes the form of parent's failure to provide for a child with adequate food, clothing, shelter, medical care, or education. Where parents are just not responsible to children, the government is just not bothered, teachers are not really concern about some set of children, and the church probably do not have plans for them., the hope of many generation is then neglected, for these neglected children will destroy many wealth of coming generation! Neglect breeds callous adults or morbid children.

Children hate if their parents' are not sincere. They are lying parent. The first time they discover this they are not happy. Although, subsequent act will eventually be copied by some of the children and some may spend the rest of their lives fighting this until they have freedom to leave such parent. They hate if their teachers either at school or church aren't sincere. This implies that stories told in the Sunday schools have to convey message than mere excitement

Children hate partiality, most especially if they are not on the favoured side. Most children at favoured side may enjoy this, you are not helping anyway! But those afflicted are not going to be happy about this. The guardian should take note of this, if you really love those children. It is very important to prevent apportioning love for children on a ratio basis. Indeed we may admire the intelligence, sense of humour, academic performance and what ever, do no ration your love, children hate this. Sincerely, I pray that we may find grace to handle this!

Children hate Daddy or Mummy do what they correct them or scold them for. To them it is an unfair attitude if scolded for an offense they know well that their parent or guardian is also guilty of. It is such a complicated issue. Some parent do this, because they know well the implication of the action they are already addicted to, but won't want any of their children to get involved in it. But I tell you, children hate this. If it is not good, don't do it; It is very important. may the Lord give grace find help to stop such. They may take your indulgence in this attitude as an excuse for theirs or some may ignore other instruction from you.

Children hate to grow up and find out that their parent have no plan for their existence and there was no purpose that necessitates their birth. There is a confidence that you will find in child who discovers that parent have plans for them. It is demoralizing for children to discover they are not really invited and all they have got to get from their parent is just birth into the world to grope through the thick and dark and find their own ways themselves. It is painful and children hate this. It is painful, if children discover that their teachers is only interested in their pay and not in their future. It is painful if children discover that there guardian just want to make use of them to fulfill some household chores and not really interested in their future. It is painful when children find out that the government of their country does not have any plan for their future; that is why you find less sacrificial citizen in such countries. it is painful, if children find out that the church they are going or their parents have chosen does not have plan for their spiritual well-being and needs.

Children hate to be told that they are product of mistakes. It is a very difficult thing for a child to stand before his parent and they rehearse this statement before him or her. It is not good to tell a child this. "From bad matches good children can be born"- Anonymous.

Children hate evil you say about the man or woman you form party with to give birth them. If there is no good thing to say about him or her as a single parent, silence is better It is very difficult for them to bear this. In the first instance, they are not happy about the situation! more so, they are limited in experience, they will never see any angelic reasons you may give to keep off their daddy or mummy and they will not welcome your ill-statement about their absent daddy or mummy for whatever reason.

Children hate this ill speech. They are part of him or her and so cannot withstand this. Silence is better than evil you say. This is the implication. Some of the children may accept you and believe whatever you say and console you by hating him or her, but some we by this hate you for being unforgiving and leaving him or her!. To be continued Note you are not caring until you are committed to the spiritual, physical, emotional and educational welfare of these potentials in the environment of LOVE.

Thank you