Marriage
Wives don’t need flowers, they need Christ.
This may come as a shock to wives even more than husbands, but it was when I realized this, a great burden was lifted from me.
I always saw other wives receiving flowers, dance invitations, romantic dinner invitations and I was devastated and I became angry. So angry, that when I finally did get the flowers, I turned my nose up at them.
Then I realized, it wasn’t flowers that I needed after all. In fact I didn’t even know what I needed, therefore it would be impossible to let my husband know my needs.
If I don’t even know what I need, how will anyone ever know what I need? The answer was always what it was from the beginning and shall be for eternally more. Our Lord created me, He is the only one that will truly ever know how to fulfill me. Our Lord not only wanted me to go to Him, He wanted me to encourage my husband to go to Him. Our Lord had left a void in both me and my husband and that void was Christ.
I realized that by be being so concerned about my husband pleasing me or about me pleasing my husband, that I was putting our Lord in second place.
Our Lord is very specific on this issue of who is to come first in our lives. No matter what, He is to come first.
After I got my priorities straight, everything else fell into place. My real need was to be serving our Lord first. That was the flowers I was needing all along.
Don't get me wrong. That doesn't mean that I don't serve my earthly husband. I just wait for the time when our Lord says to do it, not when I want to or when I want love in return from him.
I wish I could end this with a huge success story, but I can’t. I have to admit that my pride gets a hold of me and I still wish for worldly things and then I struggle daily. Our Lord is so merciful that He patiently waits for me to get back on track, after I have suffered the consequences of my pride.
Matthew 22
36"Teacher, which is the great commandment in the law?"
37Jesus said to him, ""You shall love the LORD your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind.' 38This is the first and great commandment. 39And the second is like it: "You shall love your neighbor as yourself.' 40On these two commandments hang all the Law and the Prophets."
Luke 14
25Now great multitudes went with Him. And He turned and said to them, 26"If anyone comes to Me and does not hate his father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters, yes, and his own life also, he cannot be My disciple. 27And whoever does not bear his cross and come after Me cannot be My disciple. 28For which of you, intending to build a tower, does not sit down first and count the cost, whether he has enough to finish it-- 29lest, after he has laid the foundation, and is not able to finish, all who see it begin to mock him, 30saying, "This man began to build and was not able to finish.' 31Or what king, going to make war against another king, does not sit down first and consider whether he is able with ten thousand to meet him who comes against him with twenty thousand? 32Or else, while the other is still a great way off, he sends a delegation and asks conditions of peace. 33So likewise, whoever of you does not forsake all that he has cannot be My disciple.
Matthew 18
19"Again I say to you that if two of you agree on earth concerning anything that they ask, it will be done for them by My Father in heaven. 20For where two or three are gathered together in My name, I am there in the midst of them."
Philippians 2:9
9Therefore God also has highly exalted Him and given Him the name which is above every name, 10that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, of those in heaven, and of those on earth, and of those under the earth, 11and that every tongue should confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.
1 Corinthians 7
32But I want you to be without care. He who is unmarried cares for the things of the Lord--how he may please the Lord. 33But he who is married cares about the things of the world--how he may please his wife. 34There is a difference between a wife and a virgin. The unmarried woman cares about the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in spirit. But she who is married cares about the things of the world--how she may please her husband. 35And this I say for your own profit, not that I may put a leash on you, but for what is proper, and that you may serve the Lord without distraction.
John 12
42Nevertheless even among the rulers many believed in Him, but because of the Pharisees they did not confess Him, lest they should be put out of the synagogue; 43for they loved the praise of men more than the praise of God.
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wow. I have to add my story. Been married 40 yrs, and he tired of the flowery must-do date- (he's the type that won't even wear a watch)He prefers to bring me home some little thing from a yard sale on random days.Last Valentine's D. my x daugter in law bought me red roses and a card for him to give me. I was laughingly appauled, and put the card in the trash, after he signed it, and put the roses on the bus stop. It seemed so fake. I wasn't mad at my husband- he just looked like a foolish puppy. Please, no more Valentines or flowers on Feb.14. :) Just try and be happy everyone.
There was nothing funny whatsoever about your article. I truly understand your predicament and why God led you to write such an article. But I honestly had to laugh when I read about you turning your nose up at those flowers when you finally got them. See, I used to get flowers regularly, about once a week. Then I married the guy. About 7 or 8 yrs into marriage, I saw my first flowers since my wedding day. And we just happened to have been arguing that morning. I flushed them... 1 at a time. He was shocked! "I paid $40 for those flowers!" I never got another flower from him... that is, until last year. We've been divorced 5 yrs now and he brought my son to see me on Valentine's Day, along with a handful of handpicked roses. Talk about shocked! I got over the shock in a hurry though. Should have known he picked them from a cemetary. :::smirk::: Eh... I have the Lord! Who needs flowers?
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