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Mind-Numbing Boredom
Kiara plants her face in her hands.
When will this movie end? she thinks.
She slides low in her seat, closing her eyes.
Hopefully, I’ll fall asleep, she thinks.
Kiara stills her body and slows her breathing, but her mind stays alert.
Nope, sitting with eyes closed as the music plays bores me as well. Of all the movies in the world, why did we pick this one?
Disappointing News
That’s my movie critique of Disney’s 1940s animated production, Fantasia. I hated it. Disney characters running in circles as the orchestral music of Bach, Tchaikovsky and Igor Stravinsky played in the background? That tortured me. It’s nothing more than endless motion pictures and ceaseless music with no story, no climax and no point.
That disappointed me because, as a child, we didn’t frequent picture theatres that often. It’s much cheaper watching movies on TV, but as disappointed as I felt, it didn’t compare with the disappointment I experienced at the recent news that fifty percent of Disney’s animated characters will now label themselves as practicing lesbians, homosexuals and transgender people.
A History of Controversy
This move has attracted controversy, but it’s not the first time The Walt Disney Company has aroused the public’s ire. The Bible forbids divination. Some Christians believe Disney’s magical kingdoms and cute, winsome characters teach children that witchcraft is good, safe and fun. Other Christians believe there’s a difference between fantasy and wizardry, and if you teach children the difference, they will steer clear of the occultic practices the Bible forbids.
As a child, I loved Disney. The magic in its movies and cartoons never piqued my interest in divination and devilry. That subject always remained a background theme for me. If ever I had a complaint against Disney it concerned the clothing some of their characters wear. Pocahontas, Sleeping Beauty and Belle all wear outfits that show their shoulders, Jasmin’s outfit exhibits her midriff, Ariel wears a bikini top and even its male characters, Aladdin and his blue Genie, walk around shirtless.
As a younger woman, when I wore similar outfits, I experienced sexual harassment, but I received no sympathy because I “should have known better.” Growing up, these outfits were all over my TV screen, and all the real-life people I met wore them also. I never noticed anyone getting aroused or sexually harassed because of it. Yet, somehow, I should have known that my clothes would attract negative behaviour.
Disney’s animated movies have received G ratings from the movie classification board. That rating deems these movies as safe for children’s eyes and not requiring parental supervision or input, so when I experienced victim blaming because of the clothes I wore, I wondered how those movies received a G rating if exposing your shoulders, wearing a bikini top and showing your midriff, in some people’s opinion, causes sexual pestering.
As a child, I received an Ariel doll wearing a bikini top, but knowing what I know now, why would anyone give a child a doll like that? When I grew up, I copied the outfits I saw on TV and that my dolls had worn, but I didn’t enjoy how the men or the women who saw me wearing them treated me. A mixture of sleaze and sexual harassment or anger and hearing “you should know better” followed me. I received this kind of treatment by both Christians and non-Christians because “right” and “wrong” clothing is not a belief held exclusively by Christians or Purity Culture. Even people with no formal belief in God sometimes get upset by women’s clothing. How do I know? I’ve met them.
Who Should We Blame?
Some people become extreme and place unrealistic expectations on women. They believe all females understand the effects of clothing on men. They think even young, virgin adolescents know. They believe all women wear these outfits because they’re very proud of their beauty and cunningly want the sexual attention of every man they meet. That still baffles me. Didn’t they watch the same movies as I did? Didn’t they grow up in the same world? Why am I the one getting into trouble for what I wear, I thought, as a young woman. Shouldn’t society receive this condemnation instead?
But we all know it’s not only Disney portraying its characters in these outfits. Pretty much all movies and TV shows do, even movies and TV shows viewed on Christian entertainment channels, which is infinitely confusing. As a younger person, I once heard a preacher say, that we’re living in a sex saturated society. I wondered how he could say that because when I walked through my society, I didn’t see people having sex in the street. In fact, I hardly saw sex anywhere, but once I grew old enough and experienced enough to understand why some people believe there’s “right” and “wrong” clothing, then I understood. If you’re a man with little self-control, then, yes, there’s lots of images in society that could tempt, but most women are less visual than men. A man must be extraordinarily good looking for me to think about him naked. Most women can look at a lot more skin than a man can. When we see a woman’s shoulders or even a man’s, it does nothing. It looks normal. So, when women are young and inexperienced, we don’t understand what the big deal is. When we walk down the street, we don’t notice the bombardment of sexuality as much as men do, so why do young, virgin women cop so much blame?
Confusing, Conflicting Messages
On top of that, we must contend with confusing, conflicting messages. Purity Culture taught my generation that all men have a gigantic struggle with lust, even Christian men, and that’s the way God made them. They made it sound as though a millisecond glimpse of a millimetre of skin can crumble a Holy-Spirit-filled man into a million snivelling irreparable pieces, but I once read a YouTube comment where a man said, he only feels sexually tempted by a woman wearing the “wrong” clothes if he already feels physical attraction for that woman. If he’s not already physically attracted, he has zero problems controlling himself, and I know a real-life Christian man who states he can look at a pretty woman wearing a one-piece swimsuit very easily without getting aroused. Wearing a t-shirt and boardshorts over the top, like Purity Culture taught, is unnecessary for him, he says.
Some Christian men smirk and giggle when they notice that a woman doesn’t wear the “wrong” clothes. “You don’t need to wear that,” they say. “I can control myself very easily,” or they say the opposite. “A woman could wear a burqa,” they say, “and I’d still, sometimes, think about them naked.” Then, the young, inexperienced girl doesn’t know who’s telling the truth. She becomes completely confused. Her brain implodes. Am I doing all of this for nothing? she thinks. If I change back, and wear what I wore before, will I end up in Hell and take lots of lustful men with me? I’d better not take the risk. I’d better continue as I am.
Sit There and Take It
Who knows why those kinds of men laugh. Why laugh at a woman who, in their opinion, someone has tricked? She has never been a man herself, so how can she know who’s telling the truth about the nature of men? Who knows why they’d grin and snigger at women who have either received so much castigation or so much sexual harassment, they finally surrender and comply with the long, restrictive, impossible-to-find list of forbidden clothing someone has taught them they must wear?
Even if it’s true that men can control themselves, that’s not the issue. The question’s not can men control themselves, the question is do they, and my experience is, that, no, many men don’t have any desire at all to hide the sexual things their doing to you, without your permission, in their minds, but what should you do about this?
Well, it seems, it’s the opinion of the giggling, smirking men who state they can control themselves, that you should sit there and let the men who can’t or don’t control themselves do whatever they want, scaring you, humiliating you, making you feel sick. “Change back,” the giggling, smirking men say. “Wear shorter, tighter, lower cut clothing like you did before. Who cares what bad men do. We’re not bad. We won’t do anything.” That’s what the giggling, smirking men believe you should put yourself through.
Cut Her Some Slack
I have a different idea. If a girl has had lots of experiences with sexual harassment or frequent reprimands by people with stricter clothing rules than her, and doesn’t want anymore, she might choose longer, looser clothes than you think necessary. That’s none of your business. Leave her alone. You aren’t the one who must cop the reprimands. You aren’t the one who must sit there while men make it known to her that their sexualising her in their minds.
Also, let’s stop placing the blame for what young, virgin adolescent girls wear on them. Instead, let’s look at her age; her newness at thinking with a sexual mind; the fact that she’s never been and never will be a man, so will never truly know how men think; and the sexualised world she’s grown up in, that she’s only now becoming aware of, because up until now she’s been a child, thinking with a non-sexualised mind, and cut her some slack. It’s not her fault her world set her a bad example.
Leviticus 19:31
1 Corinthians 13:11,12
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