Devotionals

The Real Race

by Honey Stone
12/18/17
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Brethren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before, I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus. Philippians 3:13-14.

At first I was skeptical. Frankly, I thought it would all go away within a few weeks but instead it stayed and I was kind of ticked. I believed I had experienced this kind of thing and it was good but it was not life-changing. 

Still, the meetings continued and so I entered in a little. Then I thought, since this is at my church and since I can’t just up and leave then I should give it ‘the good old college try.’

What is the good old college try? It reminds me of my second quarter in college. Unlike my first quarter, this one was hard. The first quarter I had fun socializing and going to the club once a week and so I thought college would be a breeze. But little did I know that second quarter would be a whole different story. I actually failed a class and it was in my major of Interior Design. Ouch! 

It felt so humiliating because I didn’t see it coming. My Design Professor showed me two of my drawings and said, “Look how much effort you put into your freehand drawing and then look at how scrappy you were on your real assignment." She was pointing out to me where my true passion lies. 

I cried and cried and then my sister said, “There are people who draft eight hours a day. Do you want to be one of them?” No, I could hardly stand that class and then I realized there would be many more. 

My counselor directed me to take a class called ‘Learning How to Study’ and quite frankly it was the best class I ever took. It taught me how to not get tangled up in the unnecessary details and to see the “big picture.” It taught me that with daily and consistent practice I could understand a subject even those I had very little interest in initially. 

Eventually I changed my major to art or drawing and I switched to a school that took illustration to a deeper level. Not that there were no struggles because there were tons but I passed the threshold from giving college a try to actually getting in the game. I also gave up the party life which seemed so alluring at first but was actually a barrier. 

So....I gave this revival thing a sincere effort. I listened daily. Strange things happened; my eyes were opened. I saw something different. I “got it” so to speak. It wasn’t what I thought. It wasn’t this one man ministry show. It wasn’t about healing though it looked like it. It wasn’t about hype and getting all pumped up. It was more about really learning how to be an inheriting daughter of God and truly learning how to be fathered and it was taught by someone who knew how to live that life. 

It reminded me of my revelation on the prodigal son. There were slaves and servants in the house and they were taken care of by the head of the household. There were sons in the house and they had a relationship with the Father, but the fatted calf was for the bride or perhaps there was a different level in son-ship; It was a celebrational relationship. This went beyond simply having a personal relationship. This relationship had true life. 

This was about having a dynamic relationship. I realized my relationship with God was casual. It was more powerful than a slave’s or a servant’s but I had wasted a lot of my inheritance on stuff. I’m not talking about clutter. I’m talking about things I thought were essential to a Christian life but were not even part of the real deal. I had realized that a lot of so called deep Christian stuff was actually fluff and I thought I had seen through most of the nonsense. But I guess revelation is layered. 

How many times had I heard those prophets prophecy that we were entering into our inheritance or getting our big breakthrough and it didn’t happen for anybody? I mean NOBODY!!! But we continued to listen until it just got old.

That’s because there are qualifications. God doesn’t take you to places that you are not prepared for so you lose it. 

I had heard ministers teach about the process and it seemed like some of these people didn’t know much about the process themselves. It was just second-hand teaching because they couldn’t teach from example or solid experience. Maybe they were fooling others but I could just feel it that they hadn’t lived or mastered what they were teaching. It was like an art teacher teaching people how to draw by using words rather then taking up the pencil. 

The churchy people were worldly successful in their church roles but they probably wouldn’t get the “Well done.” 

This time it felt like the seed entered good soil. I thought: I’m going to get this if I persevere and am patient. 

Immediately I started feeling sorry for all the people who didn’t get it or wouldn’t get it especially those who helped get me to this church and this place in Christ. I began to feel sad and then someone gave me a word that “I would no longer be lonely.” 

I didn’t realize I was lonely because it wasn’t a romantic kind of lonely. I know what men mean when they say they are lonely and I know what women mean when thet say they are lonely. Two different things and I was neither.

Rather, it was that sadness that I had experienced when my first grade best friend moved and I never heard from her again, and then it happened with my second grade best friend and all throughout grade school. It was that grieving of once meaningful and precious relationship that I needed to let go of as we both moved on in life. It wasn’t a mean split but it happened and it hurt. I had to be happy to be moving in sync with those who understood and wanted to move forward. 

I released that old pain and I prayed for those yjsy I wanted to understand and receive revival. I brought them to the altar and left them there and continued to run my race unhindered. 

Maybe the word revival isn’t really the best word or description. Maybe it’s about a serious upgrade or a higher level relationship. Maybe it’s like Steve Windwood’s song Give Me a Higher Love and the lyrics: We walk blind and we try to see. Falling behind in what could be. Give Me a Higher Love... 

It’s not just about inheritance either but it is about running the race I was meant to run and letting go of everything that got in the way so I could run it well. 

It is the inverse of Steve Martin at the end of the movie The Jerk. Steve has hit rock bottom in his life and relationships and he says, “I don’t need anything…except this ash tray.” He continues to gather non-essential items as he leaves. He grabs a paddle game then a remote control and then matches and a lamp eventually a chair. 

Here I was putting the chair back (laziness) and then the remote control (control) and then the paddle game (time wasters) and the ash tray (addictions). I finally understood this stripping process (pruning) and appreciated it for the first time. I kept the lamp (my soul) and the matches (those things that sparked my fire) because I discerned that I needed them and I went to go get some oil (the anointing and life). 

I don’t expect life to be easy. I expect testing and trials and hardship and betrayal and unfairness but I also expect victory.

As I was trying to get a grasp on revival I did some research on the revival in the Scandinavian countries led by a Swedish guy named Lars Levi Laestadius. This move of God happened in the mid 1700’s. My interpretation of this was after Lars repented of all his junk he became concerned about moving in “living faith.” This was a faith where things actually happened like in the book of Acts. He was transformed and began to move in power. This is what my ancestors found and somewhere along the way the fire went out.

I am picking up that torch of fire from my great-great grandparents and running with it. How about you?