Humor

Is The Cup Half Empty or Half Full?

by James Snyder 
12/31/16
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Many things in life have me in a tangle of confusion. I try to put on a good face so that nobody knows how confused I am at the time. I think I get away with it, at least most of the time.

The only person I cannot fool is the Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage. According to her evaluation, I am confused all the time. I would like to set her straight sometime, but I am really confused as to when would be the right time.

If I do not pick the right time, my confusion will be accelerated to the point of no return.

There is one thing, despite my professional confusion, I have not been able to understand. And it just bugs me to no end. Why are some things more confusing than others?

There is a positive side to confusion.

For example, someone is trying to explain to me something that is rather boring I can say, “That’s too confusing for me.”

What that does is help the other person think that he’s a lot better than I am which is not a bad thing to get out of some boring situation at the time. Believe it or not, this is not too confusing for me.

Another side of this would be, somebody wants me to explain something and I am not really in the mood to do a lot of explaining, I say many confusing things and the person comes to the point where he says, “That’s too confusing for me.”

Winning is so wonderful.

Not long ago, I overheard somebody say, “Is that cup half full or half empty?”

For some reason I just cannot get that out of my head and it has confused me like nothing else in my life.

If, for example, a cup is half-full is it not also half-empty? And, if it is half-empty is it also half-full?

I do not know if this is intentional confusion or if it is not supposed to make any sense at all.

I think “the half empty/half full” scenario is just for plain ordinary fools. In my experience, I have never met a half fool. Either they are all fool or they are not a fool at all. Just when you think you met a half-fool, they spiral into a complete fool. There is a question whether any fool can be complete or not, but that is too confusing for me.

Several times my wife will look at me and say, “Are you acting a fool?”

I would like to set her straight sometime, but I am a little confused as to be the right time. But I am not acting a fool. I have absolutely no skill in the thespian art of acting. Of course, when she addresses me with that question, I act like I am not a fool which I am not sure qualifies in the thespian arts category.

The confusion here is, if I am not acting a fool, how can I act like I am not a fool? What is the real difference here? Is there any difference at all? Oh, how confusing it all is.

I am afraid that confusion runs very deep in my life.

If I wanted to get out of the confusion syndrome, all I have to do is approach my wife and say, “I don’t understand this, could you explain it to me?” After that, I am too confused to really understand that I am confused about it at all. Thanks, of course, to my wife who is confused about nothing that I know.

With her great skill in this area, she has helped me out of many a confusing situations.

Perhaps that is the primary difference between a husband and wife. The husband is afflicted with the confusion syndrome and the wife knows how to unconfuse her husband. She has a remedy, according to her, that will cure him immediately.

This is the great joy of my life to be able to ignore my confusion and trust my wife’s judgment in this area. I can balance the checkbook, but I have a hard time balancing these confusion elements in my life. Thanks to my wife, I do not have to worry about it.

At my present junction in life, I do not know if I am really confused or not. It is rather a confusing aspect to think about right now. Am I confused or am I not confused. If I am confused, what are the symptoms? If I am not confused, how will I know?

Perhaps the most comforting aspect of life, at least for someone my age, is knowing you are confused, accept it and get on with life. Nothing is more satisfying in life than knowing what you are and being able to accept yourself as you are and then enjoy the rest of your life.

With so much to do in the world today, it is always comforting to know that there is something you do not have to do. I like what the apostle Paul said. “And whatsoever ye do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God and the Father by him” (Colossians 3:17).

In the midst of all your supposed confusion, sit back, take a deep breath and give thanks to God for his grace in accepting you as you are.