Humor

It’s Hot… And I Love It

by James Snyder 
08/20/16
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Recently it has been rather hot around here. A little hotter than usual, in my estimation. I really don’t know if it is getting hotter or as I get older, I’m not able to handle the hot weather.

Whoever invented air-conditioning needs to have a Nobel peace prize offered him (or her). I have been enjoying the luxuries of air-conditioning inside while the outside is boiling hot.

I was enjoying the A/C with all of its amenities when the Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage came inside literally sweating.

“My goodness,” she said hardly able to get the words out, “it’s hot outside.”

That did it for me. I did not need to go outside to check to see if it was hot outside, I did not have to listen to the weather report to see how hot it was, the wife said it was hot and therefore it was hot.

I have learned after a gazillion years of marriage that life is a lot more pleasant when you agree with your spouse. I would not say this in public, but, she is not always right, but I will never tell her when she is wrong. Of course, I cannot think of any time right now when she was ever wrong. However, that does not close the book for the future.

Truthfully, I must admit that she has been right concerning the weather. It has been hot and everybody is complaining about how hot it is, even her better half.

When she complains about it being too hot, it is too hot, guaranteed!

Not only is it too hot, but the humidity has gone out of sight.

“The air is so heavy outside,” my wife said which means the humidity is really bad.

For the longest time I was also complaining about how hot it was outside. Then I had one of those, what do you call it, euphoric moments. You know what I mean, a moment when something bad all of a sudden has a good side to it. Well, I had mine.

I found that being too hot outside is a great advantage, at least for someone like me.

I did not realize this until the other day when my wife said something along the line, “Don’t you think you should go out and mow the backyard?”

At the time, I was busily engaged in reading a book. I cannot remember what book it was but I did not want to stop where I was at and go out and mow the backyard. As I was reaching for my bookmarker to put in my book so I could come back and pick up where I left off, a brilliant thought exploded in my mind.

I love it when a plan comes together!

The conversation went something like this.

“I would love to go out and mow the backyard,” I said with a deep sigh, “but it’s just too hot outside today.” When I said that I was expecting a little confrontation from the other side of the room. But I was greatly surprised.

“Yes,” she said stammering a little bit, “it’s too hot to go outside and mow the grass.”

That was it! I won this battle. I was so excited, this is probably the first time ever I won anything like this but I could not get back to reading my book. I wanted to break out into my happy dance. It is not every day that I accomplish something this significant.

Then, not surprisingly, she wanted to know if I could help her go outside and do something. I rather forget what it was but I took it as an opportunity to try my new ploy.

“That sounds like a wonderful thing,” I said as cheerfully as I could grind it up, “but don’t you think it might be just a little too hot to go out and do that kind of work?”

I had no idea if this would work, but I was holding my breath.

“You know,” she said rather slowly, “I think you’re right. It’s probably too hot for us to go out and work up such a sweat.” She then walked away.

Talk about wanting to break into your happy dance! Did I discover something or what?

Just this morning she said something to the effect that we needed to go to the store to get a few things. I was just about ready to open my mouth when she said, “And, if you mention how hot it is outside, you will be in deep, deep trouble.” And she was not smiling.

“Oh, no, my dear,” I said as I got up out of my chair, “the weather is perfect to go to the store.”

Obviously, there was no perchance of breaking into my happy dance; however, I did put on a happy smile.

One thing I have learned and that is no matter how bad a situation may be, there is always something good that you can discover. Sometimes it’s rather difficult to find anything good in some situations.

Jeremiah, known as the weeping prophet, discovered this sort of thing. “It is of the Lord’s mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassions fail not. They are new every morning: great is thy faithfulness” (Lamentations 3:22-23).

Every cloud has a silver lining, and sometimes you have to really work hard to find that silver lining.