Humor

Will There Be Cell Phones in Heaven?

by James Snyder 
02/06/16
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Last Tuesday started out like any other day except for one thing. I overslept.

Isn’t it strange that when you have a full schedule you oversleep? Normally, I am up at the crack of dawn. Sometimes I wish the dawn would not crack so loud, but then I would never get awake.

In a strange way, I pride myself with being able to get up early in the morning. At my age, I do not need that much sleep anymore and so it is my motto, “Early to bed and early to rise makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise.”

I think I have the healthy down, but the other two are nowhere to be seen, at least from my bedroom window. Maybe I am not going to bed early enough and maybe I am not rising early enough. I have to think that through a little bit.

Tuesday I had a very heavy schedule and it started out early in the morning with appointments all throughout the day. I do not complain about a full schedule because it makes the day go faster. As far as I am concerned, the faster a day goes the better it is.

It is not that often that I have a day filled with appointments, but it does happen on occasion. Like, Tuesday.

I would like to blame the alarm clock, but then I did not set it the night before so that is out of the picture.

When I did get up and realized how late I was, I put full steam forward in motion and got to my first appointment. Fortunately, I was on time, but barely.

It was right after the third appointment that something seemed a little strange. I could not put my finger on it, but I knew something was wrong and I did not quite know what it was. I could not give too much thought to it because I had a busy schedule.

It just irked me because I knew something was wrong and I could not figure it out.

By lunchtime I was quite hungry and satisfied that all of the appointments went according to schedule. I was afraid the way my day started that it would affect everything else during the day. As luck would have it, and I do not count too much on luck, but the day was going quite nicely as planned.

I just could not get away from something in the back of my head that was bothering me. I checked to make sure I had the same socks on both feet. I have gone out with a blue sock on my left foot and a brown one on my right foot. If that isn’t embarrassing.

That was not the problem. My tie was okay. I had the right shirt on and my pants were okay. But something was wrong.

As I was eating lunch, I thought it would be nice to call the Gracious Mistress of the Parsonage. After all, it was a busy day and she had just as busy a day as I did. I thought I would just touch base and tell her hi.

I reached for my shirt pocket to get my phone and discovered, much to my chagrin, that my shirt pocket was empty. That’s right. Empty!

I frantically searched my person and did not discover my cell phone anywhere. Then I had one of those “aha” moments. I had left the house that morning in such a hurry that I forgot to pick up my cell phone. How was I going to get through the day without my cell phone?

As I sat there finishing my lunch my fingers began to itch and twitch. They were insisting that I text somebody. Anybody! But I had nothing upon which I could text.

I cannot remember any day that I did not have my cell phone with me. It is just one of those automatic things with me wherever I go. I need to be careful that I do not take it into the shower because that would be a disaster. Wherever I go, I always take my cell phone.

I am old enough to remember back in the day when nobody had a cell phone. Texting was not even invented at that time. If you wanted to make a telephone call, you had to stop at one of those telephone booths and hope Superman was not ahead of you. Making a telephone call at that time was a major business.

Today, cell phones have made our lives so mobile that we can go anywhere, that is as long as there is Internet service, and talk to anybody.

Sitting there munching on my dessert I began to think about cell phones in heaven. The thought came to me quite suddenly, are there cell phones in heaven?

Here on earth we cannot live without these contraptions, but will we need them in heaven?

As I was musing on the subject, I thought of a verse in the Bible. “And call upon me in the day of trouble: I will deliver thee, and thou shalt glorify me” (Psalms 50:15).

Long before cell phones were ever thought of, God had a plan for us communicating with Him. All I need is to “call upon” God and His promises that He “will deliver” me. What more does a person need?