Marriage

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John 2:2 …and Jesus and his disciples had also been invited to the wedding.

The wedding at Cana emphasized that marriage is not only an agreement between couples, but a third party is necessary for its success. Jesus is the third party, who when invited, will make the marriage work. Problems and challenges will arise, but these can be overcome if Jesus is part of the marriage covenant. This is the only relationship where the third party ensures the strengthening of the bond between the husband and wife. In our society, third parties usually cause the break-up of marriages and families. Efforts count for both the husband and wife to work out the success of the marriage. Each has its own set of roles, that when lovingly done, contribute to the foundation of a happy home. Our pastor who officiated my sister’s wedding shared “formula” to be observed by the couple to have an enjoyable married life.

For the husband, working on the 5Ps of an effective husband will be great not only during the first year of marriage. The first P refers to Prioritize. This means the wife should be the priority of the husband, and her happiness should be his main concern. The second P is Patience. When the wife is upset and irritable, this attitude will work wonders in maintaining marital bliss. Compliment is important to women, so the next P is Praise. Lavish affirmation to the wife will boost her mood, especially when it is about her physical attributes and beauty. Provide is the fourth P which is not only about providing material needs of the family but also vision and direction. The husband is expected to give leadership to the family during hard times. The last P is Present. Gift will make the wife feel appreciated and accorded with importance.

On the part of the wife, she can always make her husband happy by remembering the acronym FIRST. Letter F refers to Food. Some say that the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. The wife need not be good at cooking because she can always order from restaurants with home delivery service when needed. Just make sure that food is available when the husband needs it. I represent Intimacy. The wife should always respond to her husband’s expression of emotional and physical affection. Terms of endearment are another exclusive demonstration that heightens intimacy. R is for Respect which is aimed at boosting the personality of the husband as the head of the family. If there is respect for the husband, then S which is Submit is an affirmation of the biblical instruction to women. Participation in the discussion on family issues is a right of the wife, but decision will have to be made by the husband. The final letter is T for Trust. If the wife will not, who will?

Jesus, the third party should not be called to intervene only when things are hard to reconcile. He should be part of the decision-making process and His will should be sought every step of the way.

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